Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Spin Doctor

Yarn Analysis

48 comments:

Kathleen said...

You. Must. Write. A. Book.

Self-publish on Cafe Press or find an actual publisher, I don't care, as long as it churns out something I can buy and read. You are so funny. :)

Mindy said...

Coffee all over the keyboard and monitor now, and my children think I have finally lost it- that was hilarious! EVERYONE's first spindling looks like that, or worse. You weren't spinning directly off Delores, were you?

Zee said...

LOL!! Way too funny.

Is this a prelude to the soon coming podcast? Poor Brenda...

Ok, so maybe you can't spin, but you can sure write! I agree. Write Franklin -I'll read!

Brie said...

Perfect! (And looks just like mine.)

David said...

I know you like to spin a yarn, but do you have to be so literal?

Anonymous said...

Just sprayed milk over the keyboard!
So much like my first attempts.
"They" tell me it gets easier!
Ella.

the fiddlin' fool said...

I doubt he was spinning off Dolores unless she cards herself daily...

Has the wheel arrived yet? That will really help you smooth out your single.

Ted said...

Cut yourself some slack and allow yourself a learning curve. Nobody spins perfect yarn first time out. Even experienced spinners crank out a few skeins of stuff that's only good for tying up the tomato plants. I think you're doing splendidly.

If I get to Chicago (dates, Franklin; gimme dates) we can spend some time on it.

Lee Ann said...

Ted beat me to it. Stop being such a perfectionist. I spun Crayola Biggies and Thick 'N' Thin when I started.

And then I knit them into bunnies and sent them to people to amuse myself and torture, I mean, thank, my mentors.

And the fact that there is an ooh! ooh! fun! pretty! part in amongst the oh shit parts means that you are pretty much doomed to be a spinner.

Think of all the laceweight you'll eventually have, honey. You'll get it. Just not, you know, in the first five minutes.

Rachel H said...

I'm getting whiplash from how quickly Lee Ann went from 'enablee' to 'enabler'. But between the two of you, I really wanna go home and get out the drop spindle Right Now.

Jon said...

Absolutely the funniest thing was the knot.

You're a gem, Franklin. Just an absolute gem.

Sally said...

You are doomed, Franklin. I don't see you giving up on spinning. Your efforts look very much like mine--my daughter and I are both beginning spinners. She knit a lovely ear warming head band from the single she spun (not enough for a hat!) and it looks great, even if the single wasn't perfect. What is perfect, anyway?

Diane said...

Consider yourself "hooked"! You're doing just fine.

Sherry W said...

I just ordered a spindle and it's all your fault Franklin!

Will Pillage For Yarn said...

BWAHAHAHAHAHA. Dear sweet creeping zombie jesus, Franklin will you PLEASE put that on a tee shirt? Stationary? Something?

*clutches lilies*

*dies*

It is especially funny to me because last night I picked up my spindle after MONTHS of not, and well. Er. Lets just say that I can relate.

Kenny said...

You poor little thing. That was pretty funny

Elaine said...

How dare you put something so perfectly funny and easy to relate to on your blog where it must not be copied. Now we'll all be sending EVERYONE to your site just to see that. I hope you have a bandwidth pipe you can drive a Mac truck through. MyGAWD that's funny!

Anonymous said...

I'm picturing you spinning day and night all wild-eyed and laughing maniacally. Do I need to go back to Chicago and take that thing out of your hand?

Please tell You-Know-Who that I'd appreciate not receiving any more pics of a mature sheep in a thong. She doesn't get that I don't swing that way. I prefer to date my own species, thank you.

Tim

Cheryl said...

I sure hope spinning yarn gets easier...mine looks like crapola.

Anonymous said...

Isn't there a bar on Halstead & Belmont called Spin? Is this what they're doing in there?

TO

FaerieLady said...

A few months from now, if you ever want/need/desire that novelty yarn, you'll have a helluva time spinning it, so enjoy it while you can!

Sean said...

You are fu&*%ng hysterical!!!! HYSTERICAL!!!

If you want I'll send you a skein of my first spinning attempts! Your stuff looks good in comparison!

Rana said...

What kathleen said.

I'm dying here! *huge, laughing grin*

(btw, you know what that first yarn is great for? Cat toys and felting. Truly.)

birdfarm said...

that was awesome! you're a genius!

i hate just joining the chorus, but in this case i can't resist. ;-)

xoxo

Windsornot said...

While I don't spin (yet), I'm glad to see that the finale of this season's Project Runway affected someone else as well! (Man, Chloe was fine, but Daniel V. should've still won!)

Jerry & Maxy said...

Very funny. Blessedly, I don't spin yet, but I admire those that have the gift for it.

Warrior Knitter said...

I laughed so hard I broke one of my sock needles.Thankyouverymuch.

Yes, PLEASE put that on something!!! And you've also inspired me to dig out my spindle . . . . again!

{O/O} aka Val said...

Oh my, oh my gawd, you should be ashamed of yourself for causing an old lady to laugh so hard she......well never mind.
You HAVE GOT TO PUT THIS ON A T~SHIRT!!!! You would sell a freakin bunch of them for sure. And I would be the first to buy one!!
Thanks for making my day :-)

Rabbitch said...

Remember, if it's really lumpy, call it "art" and charge twice as much.

I can think of a couple of commercial yarneries who make big bucks on this theory.

Evil Susan said...

What can I say that hasn't already been said... you, Dear One, are hysterical.

Elemmaciltur said...

Franklin, when can we pre-order your book? *LOL*

chiengoraspinner said...

That's great yarn - "them's not lumps, them's texture!"

There is no yarn that cannot (as long as it pretty much hangs together) be used as accent shots in weaving. I wove throw pillow tops out of my early efforts - it is now really classy pillows.

Julie said...

I agree that this picture needs to be put on a t-shirt or, better yet, a canvas tote so that I can drag my spinning with me in a bag I will read again and again. Thanks go to whoever sent me your link - I'm glad I found you!

Valerie said...

This graphic would make great note cards. A wonderful antidote to the rather trite note cards with mulitcolored yarn photo's.

Monica said...

Kathleen, you're brilliant!

Cafepress. Tshirts. I would buy one, I care not how much it would cost, nor the ridiculous exchange rate from $AU to $US!

*beg*

*drool*

:)

Laura said...

You are nothing short of brilliant.

Leisel said...

Oh my! A friend of mine got me to buy a drop spindle recently, and so I SOOOOOO get this.

Thanks for helping me feel normal in this endeavor, rather than like a complete moron :)

Rosemary said...

Bwahahahaha! Excellent. :)

Michaela said...

THANK YOU for encapsulating so perfectly what learning to spin with a drop-spindle feels like!

Lisa S said...

Well, that is just perfect. I have been a wheel spinner for a bizillion years but got a spindle "just for fun"...I have been asking my buddies what the point of this fiddly stuff is but then I guess that it will something nice to put into your purse, Franklin. When I wrote to people asking why they do this to themselves, someone brought up this post and well, I see what/who I was missing. I am ready for this illustration to be on your doodad page. Yes, I would buy a tee shirt (sigh).

isela said...

Shoot! You heard me when I was spinning, I knew my house was wired since that incident with the FEDs...heheheh

Bess said...

Oh how we have all been there!

If you are learning all alone, though, get a copy of Melda Montgomery's video on drop spinning. Victorian Videos. That's how I learned after creating my first 3 ugly baby skeins. From any good fiber source, including The Woolery (dot com)

sahara said...

Franklin, did that wool come from you-know-who, while she was asleep?

newbie with flair scare said...

That is soooo funny. Just took my first lesson in spindling Sunday, and after 4 hours, we decided I had a flair for it. Came home and tried alone, and mine makes yours look absolutely perfect. Now I can't get my spindle to behave, of course it isn't me... I wanna tee shirt too! ... pretty please! And a book would be hilarious too. ;-)

Manise said...

Delurking- you are hysterically funny! Everything Lee Ann said- you're totally doomed to be a spinner. Having that "Spin Doctor"sketch on a t-shirt or tote bag would be awsome!

erinkristi said...

oh snap, were you in my living room last night?

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Angela Dixon said...

I really like your writing style. Such a nice Post, Can’t wait for the next one.

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