Thursday, March 16, 2006

Cover Girl

Mornings were already difficult enough for me without seeing this across the breakfast table.

On the other hand, it turns out she makes a pretty good farmer's omelette.

We had a discussion last night about whether or not she ought to be on a shirt in the shop. [Addendum: She's on a mug now, too. You ask, I try to give.] Actually the discussion was more about what her cut of the profits, if any, should be. We finally settled on a 20/80 split in my favor, but I had to give up one of my shelves in the medicine cabinet.

Modeling comes naturally to Dolores, who as you already know first made her mark in the advertising world as the Woolrich Girl way back when. She's only opened up a little to me about that part of her life, but I know there was some kind of feud with Lauren Hutton that still stings.

"We signed on with the Ford Agency around the same time," Dolores told me. "Of course at first I was getting a lot more work than she was, and I knew it pissed her off even though she wouldn't admit it. She came over one afternoon after a go-see at Vogue where Diana Vreeland ripped her a new one, and she was crying and throwing stuff so I popped her one right in the mouth to calm her down. That's how she got the gap teeth, and you know the goddamn rest. Did she ever thank me? Hell no. Bitch."

I know what you're thinking, but it checks out. She showed me this clipping from Interview of a party at Studio 54–Dolores, Truman, Andy, Liza, and Lauren–and Lauren is totally giving her the stink eye.

Other Sheep-Related News

Susan was able to find out exactly what I've been spinning on the spindle. It's wool from a sheep who resulted from a love affair (or at least a fling) between a black Corriedale and a white Montadale. Apparently Dean, from whom she bought this ebony-and-ivory roving, also has a white Romney. I wonder if his is given to leaving hairs in the bathroom sink and lipstick on the guest towels?


The Queen said...

I would be most grateful (and spend money) if you'd put Dolores on a mug.

Sally said...

Words can not describe! Good for Dolores! Keep up the good work. How is the spinning going?

Holly @Home said...

Funnily enough Franklin she is looking like our late Queen Mum ...mixing with Warhol is he dead b.t.w or has Mum written him off ?..that was her wild youth I suppose .Emilio is her wild youth now.Tell Dolores we'd buy something with her on if her friend Franklin accepts bank-darfts ?

Holly @Home said...

errrrrrr no not dafts..real bank-drafts !Happy St.Pats. Dolores ..not too much green beer .

Carol said...

Thinking back on fourth grade science projects involving white carnations and food-colored water, I wonder if Dolores' wool will spin up green if she drinks too much green beer? Dolly, can you test this one out for me, babe?

Jen said...

Okay, someone in the publishing world, please pass Franklin a book contract to sign. NOW! And if you already have, then please tell us so we can rest assured that we'll have a full volume of Franklin's humor - both words and pictures - to enjoy whenever we want.

Seriously, Franklin, you have a great writing style, a wonderful sense of humor, and a talent for creating marvelous characters that we want to learn more about.

Thank you so much for sharing that with us!

Netter said...

I think knitting publications should be lining up to ask you for recurring pieces on the life and times of Dolores. It would help us get over the sting of some of those patterns!

Cheryl said...

Get some of your stuff (esp. Dolores) in blac pleeze!!!

Holly @Home said...

Mum was saying the dreaded "Knitting" here needs all the help it can get but would be an insult so maybe "Interweave" or "Voque" ..anyhow pressure isn't good so if we just enjoy when Franklin has time we'll all be very happy and maybe some English Sheep could cut off something as a small reward later .

Cortster said...

Delores -- on shirts, on mugs, on totes, on post-it notes, on note pads.

We Love Delores!

Franklin, you are amazing. Just amazing.

Holly @Home said...

Dolores darling could that vulgar girl suggest you would inbibe beer ...I will be supping "Roses's cocktail infusions" in Sour apple mix with vodka . Baaaaaaaa-Sheba O'shawnassy

bess said...

thank you franklin--i am ordering dolores right now! gee: this is my third franklin shirt--guess i am a bit of a groupie! keep up the fun! love reading all your adventures!

Anonymous said...

It's another dreadful day at the office, but Delores has managed to make me smile. Thank you, Franklin.

TO in SP

--Deb said...

You've GOT to stop making me laugh like this. Dolores gets me, every time . . .

Carrie K said...

He probably doesn't traipse in and out at all hours.

Awesome! A Dolores mug.

Jay said...

Dear Dolores, I am writing you care of Franklin since I the Ford Agency would not release your details (and, in fact, the word 'stalker' was bandied about a few times before I hastily hung up).
I just wanted to say I love the pictures of you that Franklin has been posting. You are so soft and luscious looking... I want to lay my head on your back and stroke your wool.
I don't suppose you've done any... artistic pictures? Anything with a strategically placed knitting needle or ball of wool?

littlelixie said...

I love this picture of dolores with the cigarette. Could you put this one on a junior babydoll shirt? Love your blog x

sahara said...

Okay, that's it! I gotta get up from here! That illustration is hilarious!

When I was about ten, I lived with an aunt who looked like Dolores (sans the body wool)in the morining, and gambled at the track for a living. She was physically abusive to me and her kids, but I retaliated by emptying out her bottle of vodka, and filling it with white vinegar. It was good to move back home.

If you put Dolores on a mug, I'm gonna give it to my aunt for a gift, since she can't hit me now, he he!

The thought of the look on her face is making me smile already. said...

In my opinion everybody must go through it.

MissLettuce said...

I must confess I am a follower fan of Dolores (and of your knitting blog of course), all the way from Pensacola, FL. Please let her know that my house is her house if she wants to come down to work on her tan...

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