Friday, August 05, 2011

Culture Corner with Dolores

Hi, it's Dolores.

Franklin "Stop Calling Me Frodo" Habit is still stuck in the video editing suite (which if you ask me looks a whole lot like the kitchen table) with Harry. After three days, they're still only halfway through Harry's 10,000 hours of footage showing mostly carpets, ankles and Franklin screaming, " I told you to keep that thing out of the bathroom, dammit!"

Not to point hooves, but I was the one who said at the outset of the trip that giving the camera to somebody who needs a ladder to see over a speed bump was perhaps not the brightest idea.

So Franklin chucked the keyboard at me and said to show you my contribution to the team travelogue. It was supposed to be a series of photo studies highlighting hand-embroidery and block printing in the textile collection at the Victoria and Albert Museum, but that was completely boring and the sun was in my eyes and don't tell me what kind of art to make so I went another way.

Naked Tushes of the V&A

Study 6

Study 5

Study 4

Study 2

Study 3

Study 1

Whoops, how did that last one get in there?

We at The Panopticon thank you for your kind attention to our educational programming. Please exit through the gift shop. I'm going for a drink. Bye.

47 comments:

debd94 said...

Oooh la la! Thank you Dolores, for making my Friday afternoon more exciting!

Diana said...

So, NOT a statue of Disraeli.

Jane said...

Dear Franklin, please look closely at the last photo. I respectfully submit that that is not a tush. Specifically, it's the flip side of a tush making it a....wush? wash?

Jane, in the same of truth in advertising

Eileen said...

Ah. I can always count on Dolores!

But I don't ever want to be in the same...state...er, area, when she's drunk.

Angela said...

How I interpret fourth butt down: left cheek at 25, right cheek at 45, after having descended 3 inches due to gravity's cruel grip. (Minus cellulite for clarity.)

Peppermint Mocha Mama said...

You have to love it when you're reading one of Dolores' posts and your baby girl walks up and says "Tushy" to each photo... and then when you get to the bottom she asks "Why does that one have a Buddy butt?"
My only response was to giggle and say, "You'd have to ask Dolores"... lol.

Oh and fyi, Buddy is our dog.. the only male she's had the pleasure of witnessing.. until now... rofl.

Patti said...

cute tushes (and such), but I'm with Delores, I need a drink.

Elizabeth said...

Wee!!! Nice photos, Miz D. You've earned that drink. Go get that drink...I'm gonna go fan myself.
Happy Friday!

WonderMike said...

LOVE this series. I wanna see MORE!

ali said...

Oh Delores, I'll bet you got your wool in a bunch over all of those tuchases and the lone schwantz.

Baaad girl.

margene said...

laughing too hard to catch my breath!

an said...

YEAH BABY YEAH! that's the kind of art I wanna see!

dolores, you are simply the best!

I think I will join you for a drinky-poo (or 3)...

soxanne said...

Well thank goodness there was someone with a camera who didn't need a ladder to see the(right)bumps!

Thanks for sharing the great V&A Tush Series!

Kim said...

Oh, Dolores!

woollythinker said...

I stopped off with my 2yr-old at the V&A after Knit Nation, and wandered through that gallery. She kept on pointing excitedly to... well, all those pieces, saying "mama!" So we had a little basic anatomy lesson. It's not the worst location for lesson (i) in the Facts of Life series.

(Don't ask me why she made the mistake in the first place, though, given the amount of naturism in this household...)

Anonymous said...

Nice pics, Dolores! But (pardon the pun) we've all got a variation of that under our own clothes.

What really got me going was clicking the V&A link. Don't you think the top panel of the Jameel Awards looks like fabulous inspiration for a new shawl pattern? Franklin, are you listening?

Mary in South Dakota

kmkat said...

If you ever have the chance to sneak a glance at the tush on Michelangelo's David, do so. It is a glorious one.

kathy b said...

yup both testicles descended....the nurse in me

twinsetellen said...

Thank heavens I have gotten my culture in for the weekend. I mean, Thank Dolores!

Donna in VA said...

Wonderful!

chellebelle said...

Well... yeah.. That would be the art to look at.. Bugger what Franklin told you to photograph Dolores.. sometimes you just have to go your own way..

Pretty Knitty said...

lol...!!!

Anonymous, too said...

kmkat: David's tush would be here too if Dolores hadn't been so obviously bent on getting wild earrings in the gift shop &/or a drink.

Why? The V&A has a full-sized plaster cast of David, taken from the original, in a humongous gallery called "The Cast Court," appropriately enough. It is literally crammed full of plaster casts of famous statues, architectural bits, and tushies, all originally intended as study models. This post would be far longer if D had staggered in there on her search for a G&T.

PS to Franklin: You have to go back. The V&A is like Doctor Who's Tardis, infinitely bigger on the inside than it seems on the outside. I've been 3 times and still haven't seen it all!

LindaV said...

Buns of steel are nothing compared to buns of marble or brass, IMHO. And I'll take a tush over a speed bump any day. Thanks Dolores!

SusieQ100 said...

ROFLMAO!!!!

Violette Yarne said...

Dolores: As a fellow admirer of ART I applaud ypur photo gallery! If you can ditch Franklin, go see the movie "Cowboys and Aliens" with Daniel Craig. He should wear leather pants all the time...chafing be damned! There were some fine cinematic "shots" in that movie I feel certain you would appreciate!

Gail said...

I almost spit out my tea with laughter.

Dolores, you need to take Baby Art 101! (aka Intro to Art History) - you would have made my recitations a hoot!

Nopw Dolores: compare and contrast the slides; and please use complete sentences.

Kristen said...

BWAHAHAHAHA!!! "More fun than a barrel of monkeys!" says the professor of art history.

thenappyewe said...

Franklin,

That sheep is wild!!!! I must admit that I do like her photos...the last one was very...inspiring? Well, that said, tell Delores to behave if she can and keep us laughing!

Deb
thenappyewe
Park Forest, IL

Anonymous said...

you need a boyfriend hon. or just some really good ....you know?!!

billicummings said...

Beauty is in the eye of the butt-holder ;)

Marnie said...

I never realized how cultured I am. I am feeling immensely inspired by the art in this post.

Roxie said...

Yup - I'm still not gay. Thanks Dolores!

LisaB said...

I recently chaperoned a bunch of rising 8th and 9th graders on a educational/historical tour of France. Number 1 on my list of Top 10 Things I Learned - The Venus de Milo is sporting a Norge! And I didn't take a picture! Yeah, I never believe people who tell me they 'have no regrets' either.

Jules said...

I think that tag should be "Arse Gratia Artis."

...I'm sorry. I'll exit through the gift shop now.

Seanna Lea said...

Well, I feel educated now.

Of course, I used to study art history, but I mostly concentrated on periods and cultures where the tush was less celebrated, more stylized and less, well, real.

Anonymous said...

Lots of fun, as always. "Ooops"...indeed. I doubt it. - Joe, in Wyoming

FiberQat said...

Yes, dear Dolores, you have raised our cultural consciousness. Looking at well-shaped tuchuses makes me more conscious. Thank you.

Suzanne said...

As usual...Dolores makes me want to have a cocktail or 2 with her and discuss great things...or whatever. Your comments are always the best, too. My word verification:"hydrupe". I leave that to the fertile imagination of Ms. D.

gorydetails said...

Now that's my idea of a museum tour! [It also reminded me of a very charming book by Edward Lucie-Smith called, appropriately enough, Bottoms!]

leFiligree said...

usually those front bits are broken off. i must say this is the first time i have seen one on a statue "uncircumcised." i must go to museums more often.

Anonymous said...

My eyes are bleeding - I laughed so hard.

Berti said...

tell me what your tush looks like and I'll tell you who you are....

Dennis said...

It can't work in reality, that's exactly what I think.
play games

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