Monday, February 11, 2008

Where There's Smoke

On Saturday morning, I finished up my latest pair of socks.

Schaefer Socks 01

Schaefer Socks 02

I'm extremely satisfied. The pattern is from Kristin Spurkland's excellent The Knitting Man(ual) and worked perfectly as written. A handsome pair–interesting without being fussy.

While I photographed them, Dolores plopped down at the computer to work on her latest article for Ovine Activist Monthly. Harry and the guys were watching Stage Door for the four hundredth time on DVD and taking rowdy swigs of Ovaltine every time Katharine Hepburn said "calla lilies" or Adolphe Menjou tugged his moustache.

Suddenly the lights went out, Dolores screamed something filthy and the sock yarn let out a collective wail.

"It wasn't my hair dryer this time!" yelled a ball of angora blend.

"I know," I said. "Ice must have snapped a power line or something like that."

"Well, I'm pissed," said Dolores. "I was this close to a rousing climax."

"I thought you canceled her account on that Web site," Harry said to me.

"I meant in the speech, you little dung tag," hissed Dolores. "And now my concentration is broken and my muse has fled."

"She's probably stuck in the elevator," said Harry.

Dolores picked up my Meg Swansen paperweight with clear intent but dropped it when Stan, who was perched on the windowsill, let out a squeal.

"I don't think this is good," he said, indicating the line of fire trucks and cop cars that were streaming up the road in front of the building. The first of the trucks screeched to halt in front of the water mains by the curb and one of the crew began to drag hoses toward the spigots.

I sniffed and recognized a familiar, acrid scent from my childhood. Burning electrical insulation.

"Okay," I said. "Out. Everybody out. Now. Stay calm. Dolores, grab your coat and pile the guys into the laundry cart. I'm going to get Mrs Teitelbaum and Tinkles. I'll see you on the corner across the street."

Our neighbor at first failed to grasp the gravity of the situation. She insisted the smell was either the kid across the hall playing with a his new chemistry set or another failed batch of challah in 1510. "Pearl just can't cook," she said. "Her first husband died when she hit him over the head with a homemade kreplach."

But I insisted she pack up Tinkles and come with me. There was some disagreement over what to put him in; she wanted to use Tupperware. By the time we got into the emergency stairwell there was smoke pouring in at the fifth floor and below and people were getting panicky.

Our little band gathered on the corner away from the commotion of trucks and flashing lights, watching smoke billow from the vent in front of the building as firemen ran hither and thither and our neighbors traded stories of what they'd seen and guesses as to what might be going on.

I'd grabbed my camera bag and lenses, but thought of my books, my yarn and my drawings for the book. Still, I tried to keep up a brave face for Harry, who was concerned for the safety of his teddy bear and his autographed photo of Nancy Bush. Dolores was divided between worry over her wardrobe and mortification that she'd had to rush past fifty firemen with her hair in curlers.

The temperature was plummeting–Chicago is in the midst of a hideous deep-freeze with temperatures well below freezing–and I realized with some satisfaction that I was still wearing my newly-completed wool socks and my feet were warm.

I called Tom, who arrived in minutes and reassured us all that no matter what, we all had a place to stay for the night or however long it might take.

It proved to be a long wait for news and a certain amount of relief. We left the building around noon. It was six hours, most of them spent sitting on a "warming bus" provided by the public transit authority, before we were informed that a ComEd transformer in the sub-basement had exploded. There was no fire, but (as we'd seen) acres and acres of smoke, and the building was completely without power, heat or water. At almost seven o'clock I was allowed to make my way upstairs to spend 15 minutes rummaging in the dark for overnight provisions; I grabbed some clothes, my laptop, and two knitting projects I'd left lying on the coffee table. Whatever might happen next, I intended to knit through it.

Mrs Teitelbaum is staying with her niece in Highland Park and still insisting Pearl's challah is ultimately responsible for the mess. We're in residence at Tom's for now, hoping the building will re-open for occupancy tomorrow as has been promised. In the meanwhile, I'm enjoying the sight of Tom's mastiff/boxer mix, Augie, flirting shamelessly with Dolores.

Until I'm back at home, communication will be spotty and work slower than usual. But everything seems to have turned out well, and all of us are safe. Except for Tom, that is. Dolores keeps trying to bust in on him in the shower.

117 comments:

Tippymarie said...

Poor Franklin. Poor Harry. Poor Tom. I am not sure I feel too bad for Delores; I am sure she will be fine. I hope things work out for you soon. In the meantime, knit like the wind!!

I have been checking your blog repeatedly today. Now I know why I was worried for you.

Lynn said...

Oh my. I'm glad you're fine. And not so stressed you didn't think to grab your knitting. Those are handsome socks, by the way.

Kristin said...

I'm so sorry! I hope that everything is put to rights quickly.

Aidan said...

I've been worried since Friday night. Glad you and the crew are ok. Better you stay at Tom's than at my place...Mitzi (my dachshund/mastif mix) would be trying to burst in on YOU in the shower. She's big and dumb and doesn't know the meaning of the word discretion.

This is just an obstacle on the road to enlightenment, Dewdrop. You must be doing something right if you are working through karma on this scale. Of course, I believe I said something similar when Dolores moved in. So either I am wrong, or you did something really bad in a past life.

XOXO

Terri said...

Thank goodness for good friends and knitting in times of trouble... Be well.

Linda said...

omg - I cracked up at the antics inspired by Stage Door ... even better, when my curious husband wanted to know what was so funny... I reread the passage and he laughed out loud, tears in his eyes.

Nice job, baby. ;-)

Sid Leavitt said...

Glad everyone's OK.

Judi said...

I am so glad you are safe. Nice socks too.

Carol said...

Ooh, htat would have been scary and stinky! Glad you had some emergency knitting ready to go.

Sean said...

WOW! YIKES. So glad you're OK. A bit scary eh?

Mel said...

I was tempted to make a comment about Dolores and doggy style, but you know I would never do such a thing.

I'm glad that it ended up being no more exciting than that and hope it's not too emotionally scarring for Tom. Therapy for that sort of trauma isn't cheap, after all.

Madame Leiderhosen said...

Sometime I don't know how much to be worried about you. And then I have another martini.

Excellent story; I am glad you are well and Dolores is distracted.

Dee said...

Glad you all made it out okay. And the socks....awesome! Yep, at least you will have warm and stylish feet for the duration.

Hope you are able to get back home soon.

RodgerM said...

If there had been a fire, I'm sure your plentiful supply of encounter-enhancer would have put it out instantly. ;)

Glad that everything is okay and nothing damaged.

Alwen said...

Well, hey, I'm glad you're all right. The last time I saw firemen outside my window, it was pouring down rain and I had just given birth, and an alarm was going off in the hallway. All I could think of was that if I had to take my newborn son out into that, he was going to drown.

Sorry. That's what pops into my head when I think of those black and yellow overcoats they wear.

quinn said...

Glad all is well. Hope the smoke didn't infiltrate everything - not a great time to have to choose between open windows and indoor smoky-smell.
By the way, since you mention Dolores' curlers, were *you* wearing something besides those charming socks? ;)

Windsornot said...

Whoa! I'm just glad all or you are alright! I'm glad that thankfully, it'll just be a matter of airing some things out rather than some serious damage.

Oh, and LOVE the socks. Like the color choice too! Looks like something I'd choose.

mira said...

Glad to hear that everyone is okay.

kmkat said...

I was getting dizzy going back and forth between the reality of the fire alarm and the *reality* of Dolores and Harry et al. Glad everyone is okay. ::wipes brow::

Hmm. Did your stash get smoked? Will you be having a fire sale destash? Why do I care; I swore off buying yarn in 2008.

Jeremy said...

Oh, Franklin, those socks are beautiful. I have a brand new ball of sock yarn that I was wondering what to do with, and I think that's what I'll be doing. Thank you for the inspiration, and I'm terribly sad that I can't be at the Spring Retreat to meet you.

amy said...

Yikes. I'm glad everyone is okay, and I hope your apartment airs out without too much difficulty, too. Fire used to be my biggest fear as a kid. I'd keep my Most Important Things by my bed, just in case. Now my son does the same thing, but he's afraid of flood. (Not sure why.) But in the end, of course, the people (and Delores, of course) are most important. I'm glad you & yours are safe and well cared for.

Roxie said...

I wish I could have seen Dolores with Harry and the guys (half sloshed on Ovaltine) in the laundry cart -and I really wish I could have seen how the other folks on the warming bus reacted to them!

Lynda the Guppy said...

OMG! Glad you, Delores, Harry, and all the rest are safe and sound (and in a building with heat!).

I'm a little worried about Delores, however. I mean, here she is faced with a large group of (presumably) hunky, strong men, who spend their nights away from all their families...She would have their undivided attention...and she passed up the chance for a roomful of guys to be focused on her???

*hugs* to Harry. See? Your teddy bear was fine.

Paul said...

Very glad you all are ok, and I'm sure Tom will come out of this without too much trauma...

JoanK said...

Glad you're okay - 3 cheers for Tom and for your getting your neighbour out safely. Socks are loverley. If your stash, completed knitting and books are smoked, there are tons of hints out there to get the stench out! Give Harry a hug and Dolores whatever she needs to get her back to normal (for Dolores, that is)

tilla said...

Really Franklin, I read that as "enjoying Tom's stiff/boxer mix". I think I've spent too much time on the computer today.

Sorry to hear about your power outage. Glad everybody is safe. But in February. In Illinois.

Hey at least you aren't powerless in Antarctica with Kurt Russell and a pissed-off thawed out alien.
Okay, the Kurt Russell part would be okay.
Mich

AuntieAnn said...

Wow, such excitement. Not that you need this kind of excitement.

I'm glad to read that there are ways to get the smoke stench out, I kept worrying about your yarn (clearly you were OK since you were writing to us).

sweetfigs said...

I'm glad to hear everyone got out safely! And yay to Tom for giving you a warm place to stay. I'll bet you get lots of knitting done when you don't have the distraction of easy internet access. Looking forward to seeing what you come up with.

PICAdrienne said...

Well, that certainly takes the fun out of a Saturday. I am glad you are all ok.

Could have been far worse, Victorine could have been there as well

mintdee said...

I am so glad that all is well in your area! That would be very scary to go through.

Julie said...

I'm glad to hear everyone is safe! Hopefully, you'll be back in your own home real soon.

obsessmuch? said...

oh, that's terrible! And since I live in Chicago too, I know how friggin cold you must have been! Yuck!

I hope everything gets fixed soon and that you don't have any smoke damage in your place. :(

Tikabelle said...

I'm glad everyone is okay! Here is what happened as I pulled up your post:

The little girl I nanny for, Bella, came tripping around the corner and caught sight of your new socks on my laptop screen. "Oh!" she cried,"those are hand-knitted!" (note the proper use of the past tense!)
"Why yes," I replied, impressed. "They are! Aren't they nice?"
"I would call that color 'Pumpkin Sunset,'" she announced.

And I concur. They're lovely.

janna said...

Oh, my! I'm glad everyone is all right, and I hope the yarn you left behind (not Harry and pals) isn't too smoky....

jennsquared said...

I'm glad to hear that everyone is okay! Knit away!

jamesdotca said...

good luck franklin et al. i'm sure you'll have whipped yourself up a new wardrobe in short order. try not to freeze your tootsies off.

Riin said...

Wow. Glad you're all ok. Nice socks.

birdfarm said...

wow, i wondered what all those fire engines were.

i was going to ask if you were still living where you were living before, but unless there was a coincidental confabulation of fire engines at your former address as well as your current one (in which case one cannot but become slightly suspicious of the person the two addresses have in common...) i can assume that you are (if not this week) still in the same place.

which means you should call me some year. ;)

your email address bounced, which is why i moseyed over here to see if you were still alive. drop me a line sometime w new email address... and tell me who this Tom person is!

Ted said...

"you little dung tag"

Ouch.

imogenesis said...

oh wow. I'm glad you and the tribe are all ok - and reliable friends are a wonderful thing, no? Good quick thinking to get your neighbour out, I only hope I have such good neighbours when I'm old and doddery!

Hope there is not too much smoke damage, and you don't run out of knitting before you can go home. Keep warm :)

LaurieM said...

A fine story to distract us with, but my imagination was captured by that naked knee you flashed us along with your handsome new socks. I'm having ever so much fun dreaming about what you were wearing (or not) above those socks.

bcat said...

OMG!!! I saw that on the news and new it was your neighborhood and gave passing thought that you might be affected. So glad to hear that all are safe. Stay warm and well!

Former CWer Rebecca said...

Jesse and I drove by on L.S. Drive and actually saw all of the commotion. We were of course in a moving vehicle and I yelled at Jesse not to gawk while driving, but I had wondered aloud if their was something happening in your building. I hope it's cleaned up and back to running soon!

=Tamar said...

That's a very handsome sock pattern; they suit you. I hope the stash didn't pick up the smell; the only electrical smoke I've experienced was horrible. I hope by the time you read this you have power in the building again.

Sue said...

glad to hear you made it out safely and stylishly.

datatech57 said...

Oh, Franklin!

I don't know anybody else who could so amuse us with such a scary event! Well, maybe The Yarn Harlot.

Thanks for being you. And Delores. And Harry, et al.

Ruth

MollyBeees said...

OMGosh! I'm glad you all are OK! I hope you don't have smoke damage. Electrical smoke is the worst. I was in the University of Maine at Orono arena during an Ice Capades show when a cable burst. PU! But I did get to suck oxygen with Scott Hamilton so it was all good. Sexy socks there, Mister!

Hedgehog Librarian said...

Glad to hear you made it out calmly and safely, that it wasn't really a fire, and that you were able to grab some knitting. Hooray for Tom!

The socks are beautiful!!

Knitting Painter Woman said...

I, too, am glad you are well... although I was out of range of sirens, news coverage and thwarted electricity odor.
How is Dolores handling her Super Delegates?
(The socks are divine. Remind me of Orange Julius drinks from my yout'.)

Bobbi said...

Glad that you are all well. I can't think of a better place than Tom's to escape!
Tom'll be fine as long as Dolores doesn't utter the words "What's a little underwear between friends!?!"
BTW Great socks!!!

chris. said...

Glad you and everyone (and those lovely socks!) are safe!

Sarah said...

Thank you for making even bad things sooo funny, but so sorry for the worry and upheaval for you. Glad that no damage was done to anyone or anything and that the drawings are safe!

Great socks to have on in an emergency.

anne marie in philly said...

holy shit! glad to hear you and dolores and the sock yarns are ok.

nice leg shots a la queerjoe! (whistles softly) we gals can always use a nice leg shot on these hideously cold mornings. warms us up for the day ahead; dolores can explain it to you.

thank dog for good friends who will let you crash in their crib.

Malin said...

I'm glad you are all OK. What a relief that it wasn't a fire after all! I do hope that the smell doesn't linger.

Sweet Camden Lass said...

Glad you're fine. Seems to have been the weekend for fires (we had one in the market. Only 30-40ft flames...)

~x~

Moorecat said...

Can we assume that the book draft was safe on your laptop? That's a relief; none of us would want the publishing date set back.

And of course you'd be warm in those socks...

...on top of those charming mohair tights...

Meribeth said...

How frightening! But thank goodness everyone is fine. As well as the book. Please let us know how you are doing. A good bottle of whatever is called for...

Stunning socks! Nice legs, from what I could see.

P.S. Tom needs to carry spray on hair straightener for Dolores.

Violetsrose said...

I used to do a whole "Hallo Mother; Hallo Father. The calla lilies are in bloom again. Such a strange flower. Suitable for any occasion. I carried them on my wedding day and now I lay them her in memory of something that has died." speech of Katherine Hepburns for my Mum - she used to love it!

Liz Cadorette said...

Oh, Franklin, I'm so sorry, what a scare! I'm very glad however that you, and secondarily your belongings, are unscathed. (and also glad Dolores and company were equally rescued)

swan/dragon said...

So glad to hear you are safely lodged in some nice digs. And seriously, I'm sure every one of those firemen (and possibly some of the women) have seen Dolores in a lot less than curlers.

Gail said...

I hope the repairs go quickly and smoothly, and that all the important stuff stays safe.
(I need to take a closer look at that book, I am very favorably impressed with those socks.)

peninah said...

oh my! good luck.

Mary said...

Glad you and yours are safe and warm.

NeedleDancer said...

Only you could make such a horrid event amusing to read about without invoking the creepy.
Here's hoping that the smoke smell did not get into any of your stash, and thanking the powers that be that there were no flames, and thus no water to damage precious books and drawings.
Knit on through adversity!

Rooie said...

Whew! That kind of excitement nobody needs. Glad you and your apartment and Harry and the boys are fine. (Dolores, I am sure, can always find a port in the storm...probably with one of the firemen).

Nice socks, too.

Anonymous said...

Namaste, Franklin - So glad to know that you are safe and have a warm place to stay. Here's hoping that the utilities are back at your home and you and the gang can return to your usual (or is it "unusual") routines. Hearing you're to be at the Retreat makes me wish I could be there. (Let alone the other bloggers I enjoy.) Alas, it's not to be. Blessings and take care - Joe, in Wyoming

michelle said...

Oh my gosh!! Thank all higher forces that you're all safe and that there wasn't a fire. I hope your stay with Tom is pleasant and that the knitting you brought doesn't get finished before you can get back in to the rest of your yarn!

Carol said...

Glad you are all OK - I hope your yarn stash doesn't suffer. Nice socks - kind of an appropriate fiery color for the occasion.

Bonnita said...

Glad everyone is safe and sound. What an adventure! Oh, and beautiful socks too!

DebbieJRT said...

I hope everything is OK and your back in your home shortly.

Ms. P said...

I'm so glad you all made it out without incident (or scandal). Wishes for a speedy return home and an unscented stash!

Zelda said...

I guess if I were a ball of sock yarn, I'd idolize Nancy Bush too!

I thought Mrs. Teitelbaum's cat was Sprinkles... either my memory fails me, or she's one of those "theme" namers.

Saw your explosion mentioned rather in passing on the news; this quite brings it home. Glad you're okay; hope your yarn is also!

tadlewog said...

i'm very glad that you're safe, dolores has found new entertainment, and your books will not be too worse for wear.

good luck getting back in!

NeedleTart said...

Glad you and the herd are all right. Hope there's not too much smoke lingering in the mohair.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you are all safe! Take care and stay warm.

Scienceprincess

Barca Viola said...

Glad all are safe and hope the you get to return (that is, if you want to...)

Anyway...who is Stan?

Cheri said...

Beautiful socks and I'm glad that everything is okay!

MonicaPDX said...

Eeep! Glad everyone's safe. Glad it wasn't worse. Glad you smelled the smoke and got the hell out of there! Glad you were wearing your lovely new socks. Hurray for Tom, and I hope Dolores hasn't managed to give him a traumatic experience of his own by now. I hope you get back home soon. Good luck, and thanks for keeping us updated!

Anonymous said...

So, what sock yarn did you use? ;-)

Tomme said...

Thank the Maker that all of you came through unharmed. I had visions of Harry and the gang quickly losing weight (or body mass?) as they tried to unroll themselves quickly enough to outrun the smoldering at their ends.

nanaknits said...

Great socks! We saw it on the news but I didn't know it was your building. I hope you are all safe and sound back in your building soon.

Nicole said...

That is a knitter's worst nightmare... I mean what to grab??! Kudos on grabbing Mrs. Teitlebaum instead of rushing out with only the qiviut stash. You're a good man.

Kristen said...

Oh dear! I am so glad you are all fine! (Nice socks, BTW. Even nicer legs. Tom better be appreciative of that combo!) Very kind of you to look after your slightly daft, elderly neighbors! (Could I misuse another ! in this comment?!)

Whining Procrastinator said...

Oh my oh my oh my Franklin I am so glad you're ok. And to be able to post beautiful sock pictures and write a funny story about the whole thing - you know, you're really something special. I think you've got to be cacheing karma points for something really good. I hope you don't have to wait too long for it.

tracy at woollies.wordpress.com said...

I'm glad to hear that everything is okay (or will be, once you're back in your place again). What a scary experience!

dale-harriet said...

OH! MY! GAR!! well, hopefully by the time you're reading these you'll be aerated and returned. Is the Ball Band ok? Harry's compadres? (there ARE ways of dispelling smoke smells...) May I make a request? sneak into an office somewhere and photocopy your book pages; if anything happens to that the combined outpouring of woe would be deafening. Now I'm going to whimper in the corner thinking about what Might Have Been---nevermind, it's Jewish thing.

dale-harriet said...

PS - Tell Dolores her campaign workers here in Mad-town are awfully glad SHE's ok! I have my phone tree ready to start calling people to get out and vote. (I AM hoping Ba-a-a-arak Ob-a-a-ma will agree to be her VP. He's in town tonight, I may go down and try to talk to him about it.)

Anne O'Nymous said...

I love Harry for his wide-eyed, literal innocence.

I love Dolores for her ability to gauge the severity of an incident and plan her self-absorption accordingly. (Waiting until getting outside to worry about her hair in rollers? Perfect timing!)

I love you for your gratitude, your thoughtfulness, your creativity, and your sense of priorities in a shitstorm.

I love Tom for looking out for you and your flock of wooly friends.

And I love firefighters for their willingness to face alternately soggy and fiery hells for people they do not know.

This may be as a close to a Valentine as I compose for anyone. Thanks for the inspiration (and the lovely pictures of gorgeous socks).

The socks could be named "Tyger, Tyger, Burning Bright: if one were feeling Blake-ish and punny.

Jena the yarn harpy said...

I'm glad you are alright! Hopefully you'll be safely home soon.

Anonymous said...

Oh my... I am so glad/relieved that everyone is OK. Please take care of each other. Tami

Lise said...

Stage door.... the sharpest dialogue of any movie I've ever watched. No wonder the sock crew are addicted. How could they not be, if you have chosen a quality sock crew? (I'd never imagine you to knit the cheapie sock stuff that are Dude Where's My Car fans!)

Rabbitch said...

I hope everything's back to normal soon! I mean as normal as it gets in your household.

katerina said...

Glad to hear you're alright, and I hope all is well in your place when you return!

DutchJan said...

Lovely legs! Sorry: I mean: Lovely Socks!

DutchJan said...

But I also hope you are back home soon!!! Gosh what a nightmare you were in!

innostrantsa said...

Well, that was certainly... exciting. Thank goodness you're all safe and sound and warm, thanks to those fabulous socks (and the ever-gallant Tom.)

Caroline said...

Oh dear I hope you get to go back home soon!

Great socks!

Gotta Knit! said...

Wow. How incredibly frightening while all that was happening. Glad everyone is okay and hope you, the gang and your neighbors all can move back home very soon.

Cheryl :) said...

Glad you are ok! Life can certainly be a test.

nobody said...

WOW! I'm glad yall are ok. Beautiful job on the socks. What is the yarn?

mary e said...

Goodness Franklin, you most certainly know how to make a girl sit up in her chair, starting with the photos of those glorious socks, (on those handsome gams nonetheless) then seamlessly seguing into telling us about the fire! I'm so glad you got the crew and the neighbor and her cat out safely - thanks for looking out for others. Here's hoping you're back home soon...

Courtney the Knitting Goddess said...

the socks look good -- nice color. I was wondering, though, if they are the same as the diagonal rib socks? The stitch pattern looks similar.

knitmd said...

It is good that all are safe. Hope there is no smoke damage to the stash.... and tell Delores to offer to wash Tom's back....

Amontillada said...

You do realize that whenever you mention a knitting pattern book, I add it to my mental shopping list? When I could still be sitting in the bookstore laughing at the cartoons in "It Itches"!

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Thank goodness for good friends and knitting in times of trouble... Be well.

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starting with the photos of those glorious socks, (on those handsome gams nonetheless) then seamlessly seguing into telling us about the fire! I'm so glad you got the crew and the neighbor and her cat out safely - thanks for looking out for others. Here's hoping you're back home soon...

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Thank goodness for good friends and knitting in times of trouble... Be well.

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Ooh, htat would have been scary and stinky! Glad you had some emergency knitting ready to go.

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Thank goodness for good friends and knitting in times of trouble... Be well.
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