Wednesday, August 09, 2006

And Then Came the Invasion

The knitters are coming! The knitters are coming!

In stark contrast to last year's Stitches Midwest, at which Jon and I were two of the four knitting men in attendance, this year we've also got Lars coming in from New York and Sean traveling from Boston. And if our little tribe has thus increased, who knows how many other men will be coming?

Who else is going to be there, male or female? Speak up.

Here's my schedule:

Thursday
Morning. Jon arrives at my apartment while I'm at work, signs standard non-disclosure statement that will be waiting on dining room table, makes self comfortable.

Evening. Students' Market Preview. Not buying anything. Just going to look.
Friday
All day. No classes. Knit and schmooze, knit and schmooze. May visit Market, but won't be buying anything.
Saturday
Afternoon. "Spinning for Knitting" with Merike Saarniit. [Author's note: Ill-judged diatribe deleted. So sue me. Merike turned out to be one of the most inspiring, masterful teachers I've ever encountered. I need to be more aware of how my own insecurities affect my writing. Lesson learned: experience first, evaluate after. More about Merike in my full report.]

Totally not buying anything at the Market.
Sunday
All Day. "Knitting Ganseys" with Beth Brown-Reinsel. Jon's in this one, too. I can't wait. If Beth's as good as her book, this should be a treat.

No time to buy anything at the Market.
I'm skipping all the other muck - the fashion show, the dinner, the Big Lecture, etc. I suffered too much last year.

The Big Lecture is on "Victorian Lace Today." The title puzzled me when I first saw it. A discussion of modern usages of lace patterns created between 1837 and 1901? Would that hold enough general interest to draw a large audience?

Then I saw the announcement of the new XRX book, Victorian Lace Today, and the motive became clear. I won't be buying the book. If they didn't catch the honking typographical error on the front cover, I'd hate to think what quality control was like for the interior.

Not to mention that I suspect the XRX idea of "Victorian" must be about as historically accurate and thoroughly researched as a Harlequin Romance novel.

(Want to place bets as to whether when I open my registration materials, Rick Mondragon will have rigged them to explode?)

61 comments:

Anonymous said...

yesssssssssss, I am first!

nickname for you/jon/lars/sean this weekend - the four horsemen of the apocalypse.

what do you mean you are not buying anything? I bet the other guys will force your hand.

can't wait to see the postings from all of you on this event. and do please tell us about the dragon's "what not to wear" outfits so that we can have a good hoot.

Aidan said...

no, no, no!

The Four Hot Men of the Alpaca Lace!

And here I thought you and Ricky Mondragon would be canoodling after the fashion show. Isn't that what you did last year? Ha.

I'm so sorry I can't go. But I need to save every penny for yark shopping in New York next week.

Patience said...

I've taken Beth's Gansey class in 2000 as a 2-day workshop and it's good. Have you read the book already?

Other than that, do the best you can at enjoying the rest of the con.

All the Way With Knitting said...

Not sure that was a typographical error .Even on the B.B.C Holly and I notice a lot of grammatical errors that completely change the meaning .It's annoying as if they can't be bothered and expect you to know it's about making Victorian style lace not collecting the stuff.I know little to nothing about lace but was there a Victorian style and why do they use that term in any other Country than the U.K? I don't think we should define eras by Monarchs besides the old crust lasted so long styles must have changed considerably in her time.

Colleen said...

"Not going to buy anything."

In a pig's eye.

Rachel H said...

your visitors have to sign a non-disclosure agreement? Intriguing. Most intriguing.

Anonymous said...

Beth's a great teacher--you'll love the gansey class. I took a one-day version a year or so ago (having never made a sweater) and it really was useful to my skillset....

Lynae said...

Our knitting group is going Friday afternoon - for Shopping! Since most of us are dedicated readers of this blog, don't be surprised if you turn a corner and hear "O my god it's Franklin!"

I will be the blonde with the smokin credit card!

Gayle said...

Franklin,

I will be there also. I can't wait to not buy anything either!

Hope to see you there.

Cheryl said...

Don't worry about Jon...he has already told me "what happens in Franklin's apartment, stays in Franklin's apartment"!

The four of you are going to take Stitches by storm for sure.

Can't wait to hear about it.

Watch out for Mon Dragon's lair.

Carol said...

Franklin clutched his registration materials to his heaving, manly chest. The taut T-shirt tightened across his rippling biceps. The tip of his tongue moistened his dry lips. "Rick?" he said, hating himself for the catch in his voice.

"Tis I," the burly South Dakotan murmured. "I have dreamed of this day ever since I saw your manly chest on your blog." With one savage motion, he ripped the damp, clinging T-shirt from Franklin's body.

Franklin threw the folder of photocopied materials on the floor. Fire flashed from his eyes as he modestly covered his abundant chest hair. "Take me, now!" he said, the words sounding thick to his own ears. "Right here, on this display of Lily Chin yarns..."

Okay, I think I'll stop now. Just wanted to suggest that maybe a Harlequin isn't entirely out of the question.

Ted said...

Last I saw, they've changed the cover for the book, so that weird kerning issue is gone. And the type-size issue -- the one where the author's name appeared smaller than that of the photographer -- is gone as well.

IMO, if you realise that you're fussing with the mechanics of the tool and not getting the info about yarn engineering, put the spindle down and pay attention to the theoretical stuff on yarn engineering. (You can do the hands-on stuff later.) Take fabulous notes, because I intend to suck your brain dry about it.

Have a blast: I wish I was there with you guys.

lucia said...

You think making your entourage sign non-disclosure agreements will protect you? Naive man!

Consider this fair warning:
Heather, Kathy, Betty and I will be at Stitches on Sunday. We will silently watch for you. When we see you and your entourage, I will rush over to show you my amazing seamless handknit Argyle socks, which can be made in manly manly colors.

While you are distracted by the amazingly manliness of the socks, Heather will whip out her cell phone and secretly take a photographs which will prove you violated your pledge not to buy yarn. We will then plaster the evidence all over the internet!

Alyssa said...

I'll be there shopping on Friday! If you have the willpower to resist the call of the Market I will be amazed. I hope you enjoy your classes.

DianeS said...

I'm not sure how seriously the organizers take themselves, but perhaps you should think about eating meals off-site?

AprilBrokenA said...

While I can't drag the bosslady to Stitches, I will be at the Knittyhead party at Loopy Yarn's Brick and Mortar store. So - I WILL be in Chicago, just not at the right Part!

Julia said...

You'll love Beth's class - she's fabulous. I share your distaste for the ways that Stitches is a huge marketing scam for XRX, but the classes are great. There should be a law that if you pay to participate in something, you should be exempt from further advertising.

Tomme said...

I don't know about the bet that your registration materials will be rigged to explode, but I'd take all bets that your plan to avoid the market will go up in flames. The real question is: just how long will you be able to stay away from the vendors? An e-pool probably is in order. Put me down for two hours.

Helen said...

Pretty please come to the Market?
I don't get to take classes this year (the story is long, uninteresting, and inexplicably entwined with someon else's family reunion; don't ask), but I DO get to spend a day shopping...

Jon said...

Since when are you not buying anything? Last year you benefited from my "in the know" market analysis of yarn prices. Just think how it will be with Sean and me to egg you and Lars on.

I guess I have to see the language of this non disclosure statement. I seem to recall Sean saying I could stay with him. Bawahahahahahahah

meg said...

Perhaps we'll see you in the morning on Friday. We're stopping by on our way to a contra dance weekend ... but I doubt we'll buy anything at the Market.

Chicago Jen said...

All the chicks from the Wilmette/Evanston / Northwest Chicago knitting Group will be there! That's me (Words Wits n Wool), Alyssa (Words and Wool), Claire (Knit One Chic Two), Lynae (Avec le Coton) and three other women who are blogless (for which we forgive them). We're going to have a sushi lunch and then spend all afternoon on Friday there!! Wooot! Hope to see you there!

Jena the yarn harpy said...

Eek! How does anyone even *glance* at that cover and not see the big honkin' capital Y?

If there is a poncho pattern in there, the whole book should be pulled from the shelf. You know there will be. It's a requisite pattern nowadays... unless they try to disguise it and call it a "cape".

Have fun at Stitches!

Robin said...

I'm going to the market Friday afternoon, then have a class Saturday afternoon (on knitting alterations) and a class on Sunday afternoon (converting patterns to the round). Have totally given up on avoiding the market and have instead said this will be my "last hurrah" of yarn shopping for the YEAR.

Nancy said...

Spent this afternoon not finding gansey yarn...sigh...learn 'good' and please wax poetic about BBR's class (and send Delores to accost le mon dragon)

Mary said...

I am so pissed! I signed up for the Spinning for Knitting class at Stitches East in Baltimore and I have no intention of learning how to use a spindle. Let's see if I can figure out a Plan B . . . .

Elizabeth said...

I think you owe it to your reading public to do EVERYTHING and take lots of pictures and give the three-part rundown when it's done. No one experiences and tells it quite like you do. Plus, I'm sure Dolores will return from her travels to put in an appearance. And what will dear Dolores say to RM? We need to know. No way she's missing the fashion show.

Aubrey said...

Franklin - come see me on Thursday night or Friday - I will help you with your spindling. I am not the Benevolent Dictator on the Spindlers' list for nothing... Grafton Fibers - booth 725.

Hugs, Aubrey

the fiddlin' fool said...

I will most definitely be there on Friday morning, at the market, along with my lovely spouse.

Vicky in Vancouver said...

Browsing thru the archives, I see that you & C would have marked your second anniversary recently. Congratulations!

p.s. was having lunch yesterday in my local sandwich shop, and was unable to not eavesdrop on the neighbouring conversation, which was two ladies planning their wedding, with their minister. Like they were any other couple, like it was the most normal thing in the world - both of which are true. I love Canada.

Mel said...

I hope that the reason you're plannning on not buying anything at the market is that you're saving up for Rhinebeck. Have fun!

Rabbitch said...

Sweetie? Is there a point in you going to all of this?

Anonymous said...

"The designer who gives instructions for plus sizes (or hell, even average sizes) stands to make a mint. "

A Franklin quote. So what gives with the T-shirts that stop at size L? Now you know that there really are women out there, who go from 1X to 3 or even 4X, how about supplying some t-shirts in those sizes? You want to make a mint, don't you?

Margot said...

Oh yes, Beth is a marvelous teacher. You will learn a lot AND have heaps of fun.

I'm throwing my hat in with the bunch that has expressed doubt as to your ability to resist purchasing fiber at the show. ; )

Norskybear said...

Franklin is counting on the fact that I will be off-duty. When he says that he is not going to BUY anything, it just means that we are going to have to stage an intervention and prevent him from SHOPLIFTING all weekend. I wonder if Winona Ryder's friends had to go through this?

Angela said...

I'll be there. Perhaps we will bump into one another in the Market while we are busy not buying anything. Have a great time. I look forward to this year's Stitches Diary. I'll be happy to fill you in on Rick's performance at the Fashion Show--I'm doing the whole hog this year. (I might not have if I'd read your 2005 evaluation before I registered!)

Sara in WI said...

If you leave your shirt unbuttoned and a lost stitch marker embedded, then everyone will be able to recognize you right away! Make it a sparkly marker!

Violetsrose said...

As an editor your comment forced me to go look on Amazon for the cover - yep, huge typographical error

Sarah R said...

Can't wait to see the pictures of everything you didn't buy at the Market.

Tamarack Gerrie said...

Not going to Stitches for the first time in three years and was feeling a little bummed. After reading your accounts of last year, I don't feel as bad! It was a great reminder of all the things that were...well, off and off-putting.

Will miss the good teachers and knitting emersion. At least I won't have the annual jealousy over not being able to knit regularly with Chicagoan knitters.

Susan said...

Talk about typos! Tara Jon Manning's "Mindful Knitting" exceeded the limit for me. I lost count at the number of times "meditation" was printed as "mediation". Unbelievable. I contacted the publisher and the author, thinking surely there would have been a corrected printing. If there has been there won't be a complimentary copy arriving in my mailbox.

MonicaPDX said...

Franklin. Hey. Ok, I'm a newbie here, but I've had a similar experience. So to jump on in:

If I could haul an Ashland Traditional from one side of Portland, OR, clear across our sprawling city and back, via bus, with two transfers on a 45 minute ride each way...between the times of 6-11:30 p.m....a time, might I add, when all the drunks and folks a little bit off were out en masse in downtown, and hopping a ride in our fareless area...and it was back in the 70's when I was only in my early 20's... If *I* could do that more than once for a spinning class, you *so* can manage one measly little round-trip across Chicago. Really. I have faith. (And yeah, I realize, that sounds a lot like 'uphill, both ways', etc.; but I really did do it. [vbg])

Otherwise, what Ted said. Forget the damned spindle if it doesn't cooperate, just watch and get the info down.

Addendum to Carol: I just had to say this: Either you are soooo dead, or Franklin's gonna have something important pop from laughing hysterically. Brilliant!

FiberQat said...

Gentlemen, the Sirens of Stitches Market call to you. You cannot resist. Find beautiful fiber and plot out manly garments with nary a cable. You know you want to do it.

Marilyn said...

Victorian-style, my ass. The Victorian color sense was a spectrum of ugly greens, oranges and browns. The delusion of tussy-mussy, rose and mauve dainties. Sure. And you know that the X-men and DragonBoy have never opened a Weldon's.

I know you'll like Beth's class. She and Lucy Neatby are the two people I'd pay to sit and learn from.

I think some of the Wolvies should hold a spinning clinic at Rhinebeck. Well, me and Joe and Ted, if he comes. All would be welcome and I wouldn't charge a dime.

Lia said...

You aren't going to be home with Jon arrives??? Good thing D is off on a little "jaunt"!

Not gonna buy anything ... ha ha ha ... you make me laugh so hard.

Lisa S said...

Awww, g'won...you know that you have to check out the faaaaaabulous glass circs that Sheila Ernst is bringing for their maiden (blush) voyage this weekend. They are so pointy that you you can keep that bossy sheep at bay, while being adept at k7 tog. You know that you want to try them...no shopping. Bwaaaaaahahahaha.

Knitt'nLissa said...

I'm sorry, Franklin, but I'm going to have to delay reading the rest of today's post. I'm sobbing with laughter at your charactarization of RM from last year so hard that I can't see to read.

knit chick said...

I will be there not shopping Friday, too. I'm sure I will be able to find you by looking for the throng of your knitblogger-stalkers surrounding you, Jon, Lars, & Sean.

Cheryl said...

I'll be there Friday with a gang of six from Iowa and South Carolina. I am shopping for six specific skeins of yarn, two specific needle sets, and one pattern. Once that is done, I will not be shopping.

I also did not shop for yarn in Wisconsin yesterday. Ahem.

As the other Cheryl recommended, our group travels with the motto, "What happens at Stitches, stays at Stitches."

Patrick in WI said...

Sounds like fun! I hope you guys enjoy yourselves. I haven't made it to a stitches yet as it seems I always have to work those weekends. It's my yarn shop weekend though so at least I'll get to stare at yarn all day.

Have a great time!

Anonymous said...

My dear Franklin, have you fed your stash lately? YOU BETTER BUY AT THE MARKETPLACE!

:)

Jacquie said...

Hope Jon arrived safely. What with his worries about getting to the airport and the added security measures.

Kim said...

okay, I'm not really a stalker but I saw you today and all I could think was "it's him!" I'm proud that I restrained myself.

When I told my daughter she asked with disappointment "What about Dolores?"

Anonymous said...

I'm sure you'll have a lovely time... wish I weren't sitting at home getting lectures ready for the fall semester and eating my heart out (granted, I hear it can be tasty with a balsamic & roast garlic reduction...)

Have a great time

Matthew in Champaign

KnittinNurse said...

Franklin!
There are just so many great fibers there- I had my initiation into Spindling at Stitches West...if anything should beckon you, it should be a HUGE batch of wool and silk roving, a new spindle of course- and a set of 3 new Ashford Traddy bobbins- never too many of those.

“Designer Yarn” lives on!!!

BTW-Have you tried felting wool ( and no-not knitting and then accidentally)? Dolores would be a good donator!

If you are truly a dyed in da wool Fiberaholic-Next comes Machine Knitting!

LOL:The Four Hot Men of the Alpaca Lace!
have loads of fun!
;-0

If only I didn’t have day job taking up so much of my time.........

boobookittyfug said...

It was a pleasure to finally meet you f2f. I took BBR's "Intarsia in the Round" Friday pm. I had fun, learned some good stuff, loved her tiny sample sweaters. I know you will enjoy her gansey class.

Today was "Beyond Basic Brioche" with Nancy Marchant. Tomorrow is "Engineering with Entrelac" with Joan Schrouder.

You guys all looked like you were having a good time this afternoon.

I am NOT the same Carol who wrote the purple prose (but a part of me wants to claim it).

Carol M

Anonymous said...

Where is Dolores? Has she found some boy toy that she can't leave? Or does she want to use him all up, before she returns home?

Carrie said...

So did you keep your vow to not buy anything or did you give in to temtation?

It was nice to meet you!

Carriebelle

Monicapdx said...

Heck, I'm a 3X on top, 4X at the hips - 4X will do fine. Must have Dolores, but also need two eyes! Although on fixed budget, so I'd have to get the cheaper ones - sorry, Franklin. (Hmm...if I can afford one this month, when I see Stephanie at Powell's in Sept., maybe she'd sign my Franklin shirt as well as a book?? That's about as close as I'll ever get to having you sign, I figure. ;) Loved your comment re Joe's gansey on her blog today! Sneaky, very sneaky.)

Cirilia said...

You were the best celebrity spotting of the whole show for me! I was working in the Webs booth and while I haven't read much of your blog I instantly knew your voice from Cast-On. I'm having a grand old time reading your archives and your diary of last year has put me in snort-laugh territory. Cheers!

Jenn said...

Talk about judging a book by its cover! I can't believe I'm the only one who went to Jane Sowerby's presentation who is going to defend her. First of all, the book doesn't come out until November. It's not even completely edited yet. Jane is an absolute treasure, and if you'd had a chance to go, you'd have heard about how she spent years in museum archives and libraries bringing these lace patterns to light. Yes, she did even talk about the garish colors that were used then. She rewrote the patterns to use modern needle sizes and materials and use our conventions of abbreviations, etc., which didn't exist then. And she knitted every single shawl herself. There are over 40 patterns in the book and some are absolutely amazing. It was an astronomical amount of work, and I'd hate for people to be put off by it from someone who didn't even go to hear about it. I don't mean to sound like I'm ranting. I'm not. I was very impressed, is all.