Friday, March 25, 2011

Jabber Jabber Jabber

The voices in my head have started shouting again. Video transcript follows.

81 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are a total comic genius. Are you this funny in person?

Knit Like You Mean It said...

Franklin, clearly you live in my house and take notes on all my conversations.

mary said...

Ahhhh Franklin, thanks for the laughs. The hubs wanted to know what I was laughing at and my only comment was "Franklin."

knitinsage said...

oh how funny! even better than the first!

JelliDonut said...

"Can you not knit with the yarn you have?" WTF is that guy talking about?

Natalie Servant said...

"Not long enough" - perfect!

Michelle said...

OMG I am still laughing!!!

blogless grace said...

I love these!!!! Albert and the Queen!

ali said...

I had a rough day, but not as rough as those two. Good grief this is hilarious on some strange level.

Ted said...

Tom bought you roller skates? Seriously?

Anonymous said...

Oh Thank You, THANK YOU Franklin! For some reason Queen Elizabeth and Albert Einstein are the perfect friends/adversaries. I was excited to see them together again.

I can only imagine falling down having run over a scarf on my roller skates - it would wrap around the axles and trip me and I would need two knee replacements.

Then I would have Sitting Time to knit.

You light up our lives!

X O Irene in MI

Anonymous said...

Franklin, I took both your classes in Madison. You are an informative teacher. Thank you for the learnings. This is an awesome blog post. Melanie

dw said...

Oh dear god! My husband and I are still laughing about the cabled Christmas scarf (seriously, we'll be debating which movie to rent and he'll pull out his robo-Albert impression and say "but I don't need a scarf" and we'll nearly pee ourselves laughing in the video store). Thanks for giving us yet more reasons to appear completely unhinged in public.

"roller skates are completely awesome sauce" *snort*

Kathy R said...

"Perhaps you should breathe less air". Absolutely the best line ever! Can't wait to use it.

Angela said...

Love.
It.


(breathe less air....HAHAHAHAHAHA!!)

Ken said...

It will take 46 years and 3 months to knit all her current stash. Poor dear hasn't achieved SABLE yet.

riin said...

I love the way she knows exactly how long it will take her to knit all her yarn!

Seanna Lea said...

Gods, I'm going to have to send this one to my husband and relatives when they ask about what I want.

Of course, that might result in getting some roller skates.

Tikabelle said...

This knitting derby girl laughed until Friday wine came out her nose.

I will marry the man who buys me new skates and also yarn for my birthday.

Gabrielle said...

I identify. It turns out that my husband burnt a cigarette hole in the Noro scarf that I knitted him, as a replacement for the Noro scarf that I knitted him that he left on a train...I suppose that I should just get the message and buy him rollerskates?!

Peg of Tilling said...

I believe her majesty needs to find a pattern for roller skate cozies, in orange, with pompoms.

Sue said...

Liz will be here in Perth in October for CHOGAM....I'm sure she will be able to make a dent in the stash. My (non-knitting) Missus and I were both cracking up laughing as we watched this. She can relate to Albert...and I to Lizzie!

Kate said...

LOVE! Have to go watch it 42 more times!

Kate said...

p.s. I'm going to be stealing "awesome sauce" as a catch phrase. I will of course, be crediting you.

SusieQ100 said...

Franklin, your mind is deliciously disturbed!! Thanks for the laughs!

Small Town Knit Guy, Rusty Boyd said...

I totally love it. It is the perfect start to my day!

Helene said...

oh, that was wonderful, thank you for the laugh, you clearly have been eavesdropping on conversations between my husband and me--including the Christmas scarf!

Pretty Knitty said...

Hil-fricken-larious! Thanks for the early Saturday (late Friday, whatever) laugh! Now I can do my taxed without losing my funny for the day!

Ady said...

This was a perfect start to my day today. I loved it! Hilarious!

Roxie said...

It is scientifically established that Franklin is awesome sauce and a barrel of fun.

SallyT said...

Love it!

Samina said...

I love you. Marry me. Or at least run away with me.

Anonymous said...

Oh my, this was hilarious. Thank you for sharing "the voices in your head" with the rest of us!

theyarnstashisattacking said...

Yet another place where I want my Ravelry funny button. The world would be a better place with Ravelry buttons everywhere.

Harpa Jónsdóttir said...

Hilarious! Thank you!

Mim said...

Thank you so much for the laughter! You brighten my day as few others can.

artohline said...

Wow, Franklin, this is hilarious! I was laughing out loud and sent the link to all my friends. HAHA! Thanks!

seashells said...

thank goodness I've learned to put my coffee down before hitting the "play" button. Even a really good cup of coffee isn't so good coming out of nostrils. :-)

Alwen said...

Yes, thank goodness for previous "swallow all beverages" training!

FiberQat said...

It's a pity Albert missed the most logical thing which is put on the roller skates and go to the yarn shop to placate Her Majesty. Because nothing placates the missus more than yarn.

Lucette said...

Oh Franklin, I watched this at the public library, and it is very hard not to laugh out loud and get tossed out.

TECHknitter said...

cute!

Amanda Haugland said...

Franklin, I adore you. I believe that this concept could be developed into a series entitled "Voices In My Head."

Barbara said...

I do love them and their fine diction. I hear them speaking now. BTW, was there a birthday or christmas with NO yarn?

anne marie in philly said...

oh bloody hell! can you see HRH QE2 doing this? yeah, me neither.

PS - word is "nagging"; how apropos! smooches!

JK_in_KC said...

Hope this does not mean someone gave you something as useless as rollerskates for your birthday!

Gerri in St Paul said...

What Amanda said.

It was so good to get tickeled by the video and then to read the tag!

scifiknitter said...

I enter a new week with hope - hope that Albert and Elizabeth will be back again. Very funny and full of close observation of the knit-obsessed!

Mamma Spice said...

I had to post this link to facebook. After all, I will be 40 this year and the last thing I want is Roller Skates.

Anonymous said...

OMG.....I have just cried off all my makeup! That is just hysterical!! Great job! Keep them coming.

Darlene said...

I have to tell you, I haven't snorted my drink since I was a kid at home and my dad used to try and make us laugh at the dinner table!

I've not been on your blog before. I innocently followed this link and hit play. And I was drinking some water. In fact, I was just about to turn it off when I got broadsided by a comment and I now have to dry the water off of my keyboard!

This was funny.

Linda said...

That is megafunny even for my nonknitting family!

Susan said...

You are so very funny!

Kristina Knits said...

OMG Franklin this is the best video ever! Thanks for cheering up my day!

SR said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Roggey said...

"Completely awesome sauce..." Bwahahaha!

(Even if I misheard that line, it still cracks me up!)

Deanna deCampos said...

Hysterical! Love it. Thanks for sharing your wit. (PS - I'm going to Iceland!!!)

Gail (nosenabook) said...

Too many favorite lines to choose just one. Oh, I know! It was when there was NO PAUSE before the Queen said how long before she ran out of yarn.

garilynn said...

Dysfunctional relationship, always happy to watch them, so glad to not be in one!

Deana said...

Oh my, that was too funny, and so close to home!

Lisa said...

Recent conversation at my house:

ME: I'm going to the yarn store.
HIM: Are you out of yarn (said in snotty, snarky, sarcastic manner.)
ME: (Looking him dead in the eye.) Yes. Yes, I am.
HIM: Splutter, splutter...no, you're not!! Why would you tell such a bald-faced lie??
ME: Why would you ask a question to which you already knew the answer?? (See the great grammar moment there?)
HIM: ...

The End

I should make a little movie of my own.

Toni said...

Maybe he needs some pom poms for his roller skates. They might cushion his fall when she pushes him into the street!!

chocolateknits said...

46 years, 3 months & 11 days -- well, she unquestionably needs more yarn!

la takahashi said...

Thank you. I needed that. I love your text to movies!

Psuke said...

That was utterly hilarious. and I loved the hand motion when Albert suggested (a tad fearfully) that perhaps her majesty should do some knitting.

Funny that someone as brilliant as Einstein didn't see that rollerskating to the LYS was the perfect solution..

tamara said...

Holy christ on a cracker, that's funny!!

Jill said...

I made the mistake of sharing this with my children (14, 10, & 4 years). Now when I am trying to be Firm about whatever, they just smirk and say "perhaps you should take a break from breathing" and I begin to giggle helplessly. You are the absolute best.

Karen in VA said...

Hilarious!!! Thanks for the laugh.. and I like the voices in your head way more than the voices in mine.....

Patti said...

That was just too funny, and total AWSOMESAUCE

catwoman5645 said...

You really need a warning on these videos - "it is highly recommended to relieve oneself before viewing - management is not responsible if you laugh so hard that you pee yourself".

I really needed that laugh today!

Carin in NJ said...

This might even be funnier than the first one, if that is even possible. Well done!

LesleyD said...

I loved both of them!! too awesome Franklin!

MadMama said...

I actually had this convo....last birthday with my husband and children. They tried to perform a yarn intervention!

Nopinkertons said...

Have you seen the book "Knit Your Own Royal Wedding"? I suddenly have a weird vision of QEII knitting a little copy of herself.

Shelley said...

You never cease to amaze me with your wit!!

Nadine Sexton, Marin, CA said...

OMG!! I can't stop laughing. This is SOOO my husband and me!! HA!!! I ditto the previous message (..."comic genius"). I love "It Itches" book. I've read it several times! Keep us knittin' & laughin', Mr. Habit!

Michael Carter said...

Brilliant!

MaryEllen said...

Franklin: I bloody well love you and your 15 seconds will never be up!

Anonymous said...

Even my husband was laughing! You're a genius!!

MaryjoO said...

I'm almost a month late looking at this, but could barely stop laughing and it immediately came to mind that this is a knitter's version of "Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus."
thanks SO much!

sohbet said...

good supers sohbet