Thursday, May 14, 2009

Warning Signs

40 WhacksYou know that yarn is running your life when you're watching a documentary about Lizzie Borden, and you rush to pause the DVD for a closer look at the grisly police photo of her butchered father because it appears that the pillow under his (bleeding, disfigured) head is made of crochet.

And then you realize half an hour later that you've missed the subsequent details of the investigation and trial because you've been thinking about whether Lizzie did crochet, and whether that might explain anything, and feeling frustrated that the people who made the documentary didn't bother to find out.

98 comments:

Norie in PA said...

Oh my Franklin -- I thought I was the only one to do stuff like that.
I watched/paused Ballykissangel repeatedly for a hat and a sweater.
I want you to know how very much I enjoy our little visits here on the web -- even the ones that make me burst into laughter and spill my morning coffee -- thanks for sharing

kirsten said...

ROFL -- ah yes, occupational hazards.

North Of Normal said...

Hah! I lost about ten minutes of the Twinks v. Bears movie trying to figure out Spock's sweater...

Rudee said...

Yes! All the knitwear Cameron Diaz wore in The Holiday had me watching that movie over and over. They were stunning pieces.

Steel City Knitter said...

Yeah. . . you are not alone, friend. You are not alone. And I think that's the truly scary bit.

Anna said...

I stopped weeping over Tess' dead baby in the recent Masterpiece Theatre version of Tess of the D'urbervilles because I was so busy trying to figure out the pattern to the blanket and bonnet he wore. That's kind of sick on my part.

Ann said...

You know, I scrutinized the picture, too, and your entry left me with one thought: That crochet is just as relaxing/stress relieving for its practitioners as knitting is for knitters, so Lizzie's crocheting wouldn't have led her to massacre her family. I think yarn is running my life, too.

mamacita max said...

stuff like that is how i end up purchasing more yarn..."hey! i could make that!"

May said...

I wonder if her killing implement of choice would have been different if she had chosen to knit instead. Those needles can get mighty pointy.

Alyoops said...

Haha, this is made even more amusing by my discrimination that crocheters are a little batty.

junior_goddess said...

Dork.

Join the club.

Roxie said...

I read an interview with a neighbor who said that Lizzie had been a problem, but lately had straightened up, and was even crocheting an afghan for her stepmother.

The Chilly Hollow Needlepoint Adventure said...

Documentary on Lizzie? WHERE!??!!!

Didn't notice the pillow. I'm always studying the wallpaper in those crime scene photos and wondering if the busy pattern led to murder....

As far as I know, Lizzie did no handcrafts. sigh

Explains a lot, doesn't it?

=Tamar said...

I read an article (I forget where) whose author believed that the maid did it. She was known to be disgruntled, had no alibi, and nobody even bothered to question her.

Anonymous said...

yeah, yesterday i watched Dracula starring Frank Langela; once and a half and the special features too. couldln't get enough of looking at him and the headrag his Mina was wearing. the scarf seemed to have a ribbed edge and looked like arrowhead lace.

marie in florida
where i do suppose lizzy worked crochet because she was a lady of her time.

Steven said...

I know exactly what you mean. The whole time Vera Drake was "helping young girls out" with her soap and disinfectant-filled Higginson bulb syringe, all I could think about was what a cool job it would be to knit period sweaters for movies, like the ones I was seeing on the screen...

LesleyD said...

OH thank god!! I thought I was the only one!!

holli said...

It's so nice to run across other seriously warped movie viewers who, shall we say, look beneath the surface, and find the yarn! Great to have you back a bit more often again.

CraftyGryphon said...

You are SO not alone. There's a stupid sweater one of the girls on some reality show ("For Love or Money") was wearing in an episode lost to the realms of time that I should've taped but didn't.

Images of the sweater that might have been taunt me to this day...

Marissa said...

I thought I was the only one who did that!

kmkat said...

Yep. The sweaters and scarves on Grey's Anatomy were always one of the reason I watched.

silverarrowknits said...

I have been known to get distracted by the knitting/crocheting in movies too.

BTW, Lizzie Borden's house is now a museum and B&B. I went there several years ago with some friends. The original furniture is still there, but I am not sure about the pillows. I bet you could make a call...

graybastian said...

While watching a vampire movie, right at the point where the girl was about to get bitten and killed, I suddenly lost the thread of the movie when I noticed the girl was wearing a really nice cabled sweater.

heather said...

I often feel that they should offer patterns from books,documentaries and movies at the end of them. My kids and Hubbie hate it when I stop and back up things to look at the yarn items. Of course when it is something they want(like Zac Brown's cabled hat in Chicken Fried video)They will spend an hour in slow motion so I can draw it.

FiberQat said...

During a special showing of "Imagine Me and You" I was enamored by the heroine's sweaters (she was in London - the yarn had to be Rowan). My friend that had invited me to it had to listen to me go nuts over the sweaters. Later I found the movie on DVD and wondered why I made all that fuss over the sweaters. It must have been the allure of the big screen showing all the stitch detail.

Lynne E. said...

Oh my! When I think of how many times I've seen that photo, and never noticed the pillow . . . what's wrong with me? Now you've given me something else to obsess on in the Lizzie Borden case. (She did it, of course. But she had a great lawyer who asked the jury whether they believed it possible for a respectable, upstanding daughter to kill her parents.)

Jewel said...

OMG! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who does this. I'm sending a link to this post to my hubby to show him there are more people like me in this world!

Jaclyn Bailey said...

I make my husband a little crazy every time I mumble under my breath "I bet there is a pattern for that on Ravelry" during a movie...

melistress said...

And I thought *I* had a problem. ;-)

LizzieK8 said...

Yup, you've got it bad.... ;) But, you have good company!

KPiep said...

Masterpiece Classic...need I say more? (I worked at a historic site for 4 summers as a teen....it's happily colored my world view.)

Harpa J said...

Knitwear, colours, patterns, furniture, old houses, - the list is long...

Hester from Atlanta said...

In the later seasons of the Gilmore Girls there were several really interesting man sweaters that Sookie St. James’s boyfriend, later husband, Jackson Belleville (real name Jackson Douglas) wore – I had to stop the DVDs more than once to sketch these sweaters.

not supergirl said...

I stopped at the LYS on the way home from seeing The Golden Compass in the theater. :) I knew I couldn't be the only one.

Rachel said...

There are crocheted pillows in the bedroom as well.

Kristen said...

I was too busy looking at the couch itself... Oh those curves!

Anonymous said...

Whew! I am so glad it turns out I am not related to her. One of my forbearer's sister's married her father or grandfather something, so I guess she was my Nth cousin umpteen times removed. Maybe they let her off because she couldn't possibly both crochet and wield an axe?

Leah

Anne O'Nymous said...

In _Whale Rider_ I kept wondering where all the great sweaters came from. New Zealand, cold, sheep, wonderful sweaters, and NO ONE was knitting?

Yep, I had to watch it more than once to catch everything. (Fortunately, it was worth it, and it wasn't gory in the least.)

Shabana Azmi often knits and crochets in Bollywood movies, I rarely see sweaters on people in them. But don't ask how many pictures of knit hats and marvels of sari, screen, and architectural designs I have paused movies to take pictures of. Oh, my....

BadMommy said...

It seems clear to me that if Lizzie did indeed make the pillow on the couch, she couldn't possibily have committed the murders. If she had, she would have moved her work so that it didn't get ruined with bloodstains...

Laura said...

Could you not find a clearer picture? Its just cruel to leave us hanging with a blurry image like that...

Anonymous said...

Oh great, now you've got me doing it.

Pickyknitter said...

I read a book years ago - it was her sister.

There is a gorgeous shawl in "Stardust" that I freeze framed for almost as long as the rest of the movie. It is in an early scene in the dry goods shop, white and natural colored wool with scallops *swoon*

The Knifty Knitter said...

Oh my gosh! I laughed out loud at this. How absurd...and yet, how true. I do the same thing all the time. Except then I would have spent 3 hours on Google trying to figure out if she did crochet.

Carol said...

I hope you were watching the cheesy 70s movie starring Elizabeth Montgomery (teevee's Bewitched!).

Bobbi said...

You truly ARE my kindred spirit!

Riin said...

Several years ago, back when I had a tv and a vcr (told you it was several years ago), I spent probably an hour pressing rewind, play, and going frame by frame as I charted out the cable pattern on the sweater Erica Glasener was wearing on an episode of A Gardener's Diary. I still have the chart, though I never did make a sweater from it. Someday!

Julie said...

A couple weeks ago I paused a documentary to check out someone's handknit sweater. (It was a yoked sweater, in a larger gauge.) My nose was about touching the TV screen when my husband caught me at it.

He told me I'd go blind. As I recall it's not knitting that does that.

Anyway, if you're developing some... knitting... issue... well, you've got a lot of company. We're all in the handbasket with you.

knithound brooklyn said...

Oh, yea, I know that one well. Heh.

Anonymous said...

Y'know, Franklin, not a ton of help to have you put such a graphic picture right at the top of your blog. I could have done without that, this evening.

gayle said...

As a spinner, I have a corollary malfunction: I see a bleached blonde with long fluffy hair, and I realize I'm planning how I would spin to take advantage of the dark roots...

woolywoman said...

t could be tatting. Tatting would cause me to become a axe murderer.

Thea said...

I belong to a forum in Ravelry, FiberFlix, and that is all we do. Thanks goodness you are normal!

Pam said...

I've been rewatching the first season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and I can't *believe* I didn't notice her amazing crocheted pillowcases the first time around...

Tim said...

What does it say about me that I recognized the photo as the dear, departed Mr. Borden before reading the blog entry? (Cue scary music...)

trek said...

What you didn't record it for later reference?

Anonymous said...

ok that is funny! I do it all the time and am so thrilled that I am not the only one to do it!!

Alwen said...

Tatted-looking collar on a doll on the Island of Misfit Toys.

:D

Carol said...

Maybe the crochet was the work of Lizzie's mother and Lizzie was a knitter?

Samina said...

If that was in fact Lizzie's work, it must have had a hell of a mistake in it (that she found after binding off) for her to allow someone to bleed all over it. Either that or she used Red Heart & she figured she could just bleach out the stains.

FugueStateKnits said...

Hey wait a little minute here, folks! Lizzie Borden was acquitted!
You know what they say: If she didn't knit, you must acquit.
(sorry)

Rhonda Jean said...

We've never met, but your twinks/bears analogy is sweeping Palm Springs. Or maybe we have: I used to teach at that ivy-covered institution you mentioned as having been the scene of your induction into knitting. Anyway, you're a stitch! (you should pardon . . . etc.)

Kim said...

I have an episode of "Andy Griffith" saved on my DVR because I'm trying to figure out how to duplicate one of Ellie's sweaters. :-)

Eileen said...

Have you seen the sweaters in The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe? (The newesst version, I mean.) Not to mention Mr. Tumnus's scarf.

Unfortunately, I was watching it with non knitters who did not appreciate the...interruption, I think they called it.

stephanie said...

Hilarious - laugh out loud post! I love you. You made my day!

I have been looking for a copy of a made-for-TV movie called "The Substitute Wife" w/Farrah Fawcett - it's a pioneer flick and all I remember is she wore an amazing black sweater throughout it...

We're wierd.

Cindy G said...

Yup!

Ann (yet another) said...

I have to say that I didn't pause for Lizzie's documentary, but have been known to freeze frame and screen capture on occasion. This particular affliction started back with quilts. There is a Jeanette MacDonald/Nelson Eddy flick that I have a copy of solely for a scene that has a bunch of quilts in it I want to look at more closely. I have a quilt that is based on one I saw in Anne of Green Gables.

Right now I have screen captures of several handknits from Boys Over Flowers - although why 2 poor girls working in a porridge shop are wearing such great handknits is a mystery - AND I have saved the DVD of Men With Brooms (mind out of gutter people, it's a Canadian comedy about curling) because there are 2 sweaters in there I am drooling over.

peony said...

Oh... I do that all the time...drove my ex crazy (maybe that is why he is my ex???) anyway, I am not familiar with the movie, so I can't really say if she did or not... all I know there is no such a thing as a crochet-machine, so someone must have done it :-))

The Chilly Hollow Needlepoint Adventure said...

I'm back, after having done a bit of research, none of which revealed any good photos of other crafts in the Borden house. But I did find this blog which is full of tidbits and architectural details of the Bordens' house and those of the neighbors.
http://sanctaflora.wordpress.com/

True crime appreciators will find this very interesting. Perhaps Franklin will knit us a murder sweater in honor of Lizzie?

Annie said...

Would you believe that Thursday, while driving past Old Fall River, MA I was trying to remember the lyrics to "You Can't Chop Your Papa up in Massachusetts."

JudithNYC said...

For me it was "Volver". All of Penelope Cruz's sweaters were gorgeous.

PS Are you telling me you think LB did it? She was innocent, I tell you, innocent. But if she did it, the old dude had it coming.

Sandie Knapp said...

Oh boy, that was rich! hahahahahahahahhaha

Kate said...

Once once of my friends got up and left during the Shipping News because I was going 'I think that's brioche stitch. Or maybe it's just a twisted rib. Anyway, they all have the same jumpers - I wonder who knti them?'

Kate said...

Once once of my friends got up and left during the Shipping News because I was going 'I think that's brioche stitch. Or maybe it's just a twisted rib. Anyway, they all have the same jumpers - I wonder who knit them?'

They just up and left me.... to be fair, that WAS after we'd gone through the same thing for Sweeney Todd.

Miss Sandra said...

But even more important...did the stain come out? ;P

Colleen said...

I'm reminded pretty much every time you post why I like you so much.

goosefairy said...

Ok. That's it. You simply *have* to write another book. Your last 3 posts were jewels.

(BTW, Star Wars isn't science fiction. A common mistake. It's what is known as space opera. Not one lick of science innit.)

Knitting Librarian said...

You are hilarious.

I want to make the shawl in Pan's Labyrinth.

Fiona Ellis said...

Hey I always rate movies on how much knitting (or crochet) was featured...AND my friends will sometimes comment too, esp it is was a particularly good "knitting movie".

sahara said...

From what I remembered, she butchered her mother too. I hope she didn't crochet that pillow.

Careful Franklin. You might start a cult phenom, especially if we can find the pattern in the Godey's Ladies Book!

For me, it was Miss Marple. On one episode she showed up at a suspect's home in a sweater coat that I can't stop thinking about.

Anonymous said...

I must be blind, I see no bloodstains, there for he was killed elsewhere, cleaned up,and placed on the couch by someone who didn't give a @*& about the pillow and all that handwork. There for, she did not do it! She was Framed!

Anonymous said...

omg, made me laugh out loud. i am sick that way too sometimes.

catherine

Judith said...

Hey, there, Franklin! My husband and I are in Chicago for a short weekend. After touring the Harry Potter exhibit at the Museum of Science & Industry (there were a few knits I wish they'd have let me photograph!) and visiting the Chicago Art Institute, we walked over to Loopy Yarns where I indulged in four (ack!) skeins of yarn that will each become socks. I wasn't sure whether we'd see you there, but I wanted to give you a shout out nonetheless. It's a beautiful city!

Suzyssister said...

You are not alone! This mad my night Franklin!

Lisa said...

I did this during that last Harry Potter movie. The sweater that Luna had on? Adorable. I finally decided that it was crochet (not my forte) and decided to move on!

SunshineDreams said...

I'm going to use this blog as proof for my family that there are other people out there as obsessed as I am. Maybe even more.

Not sure that will really reassure them, though...

bunnnyfoofoo said...

I am in good company.

Anonymous said...

OMG, Franklin. You are as sick as I am.

Maven said...

I have long been interested in Lizzie. I am sure if you contact the folks who run the B&B out of the Borden home, they'll be able to give you more information regarding Lizzie & crochet (and possibly of the pillow in question).

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