Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Christmas Knitting Update

(Note: Some details have had to be obscured in order not to spoil the surprise. But of course you'll know what I'm talking about, right?)

Way back in August I had an epiphany about what to knit for _____ for Christmas. I had been kicking around patterns and considered doing a _____ or maybe a _____ , or even a pair of _____ , but even after scouring the Internet and my LYS I turned up nothing entirely suitable.

So I decided to make a _____ , and work out the design myself using patterns by _____ and _____ as points of reference. (I've always loved _____'s way of handling these; in fact I'd be tempted to make one for myself except I think the _____ on the _____ might drape less than flatteringly on my _____.)

The yarn I picked out is _____ in the colorway _____ , which I think is both _____ and _____ enough to make the _____ really stand out. My only fear is that might a little _____ for _____ , but you have to take chances sometimes if you want to make something special.

Of course, _____ is notorious for putting a lot of _____ into her _____ and I have no intention of doing anything of the kind. All of those _____ might look fine on her, but of course she has no _____ to speak of so she's doesn't have to worry about her _____ looking like a _____ stuck in a _____ with a couple of angry ______ and Condoleeza Rice.

It's coming along splendidly, so I took it over to the park and got a couple of progress shots, mostly of the ____ on the ____. Here's one:

Mystery Project

Do you think the _____ looks wonky? I know, it's a little dark. I probably should have gone earlier, when the light was better. Oh, well.

Field Trip!

Tomorrow morning I get to go over and play with the nice boys and girls at Lorna's Laces headquarters. I've never been. I'm so wired at the prospect I probably won't be able to sleep tonight. I feel like this:

Ticket

and when confronted with gorgeous vats of dye may well end up like this:

Dye

Note to Beth: maybe you should put the lids on tight.

66 comments:

Unknown said...

Oh Lorna's Laces....you lucky ____!!!!

Anonymous said...

Mad libs for knitters? Love it.

laceandcable said...

I'm sure that ______ will really enjoy the _____ that you make. _____ seems like the perfect colorway for ___. Keep us updated with those great progress photos!!

Glenna C said...

Fantastic! Oh, I'm sure the LL trip will be glorious. And the ___ will be a great gift for ___ no doubt.

Janice said...

Since my name fit perfect in the slot left open to receive the knitted present, I will remain surprised and excited when I open it Christmas morn!!! LOL

Unknown said...

Dude, I think Dick Cheney got to your holiday list before you were able to publish.

...maybe not...it's got too many big words left in it.

Anonymous said...

I'm totally knitting the same project!

Anonymous said...

I'm with anonymous! Mad libs!!!

pacalaga said...

I'm more partial to the blueberry girl, myself.

Anonymous said...

Y'know, just the other day I was reading someone who was saying that blogging around the holidays was such a pain in the ass... (Well, everyone else beat me to the ___ bit. [g]) Obviously it's going to be a lovely whateveritis, though. (Although I am having visions of certain parts of anatomy looking like two piglets fighting in a gunnysack. With Condie Rice.)

Have fun at Lorna's!

Anonymous said...

Let's ____, you dawg.

Anonymous said...

Oh cool! A Mad Lib! Thanks!

When I go to coffee roasters I get visions of swimming through coffee beans kind of like Scrooge McDuck. Have fun with Lorna's!

Anonymous said...

I don't think the ______ looks wonky at all. Once it's blocked you'll feel better about it...

Five Ferns Fibreholic said...

That's how I felt when Jane Ellison complimented me on my finishing techniques of one of her designs.

dpaste said...

Sorry, I drew a blank reading this post.

Anonymous said...

I don't think it looks wonky at all!

sloth-knits said...

_____ sounds like it's going to be great!

Darned Christmas knitting. I'm even afraid of putting photos of ___ in Ravelry (which ___ can't access) because that would mean posting them on Flickr too, where they might be seen by ___.

YTT said...

Sorry, Dolores has already guessed it's for her. Whatever it is. Preferably several of them.

I was going to use the MadLibs line, but ___ and ____ already beat me to it.

Tomme said...

Oh, this is so funny! My only question is just what does drape well on your _____?

PICAdrienne said...

So, if we complete the mad lib, do we get a prize if we can make Dolores blush?

Rebecca said...

That's my new favorite curse phrase:

That looks like a blank stuck in a blank with a couple of angry blankity blanks and Condoleeza Rice!

:-)

The light's perfect, I don't think it looks wonky at all.

Mel said...

Speaking of the holidays, will you be visiting Maine again this year?

Carol said...

Looking forward to more mad libs posts as the holidays approach. Now off to do my gift knitting myself...

mary said...

It reads like a knitterly mad lib! There's gonna be some kinda fun at my next knitting group nite.

bellamoden said...

You are so funny! Love the mad libs.

And Lorna's Laces?! Dude.

Anonymous said...

I laughed my _____ off. I did not expel _____ through my _____. I'll take that as a warning to always properly prepare myself for reading your blog.

Aidan said...

I have 4000 yards of gossamer merino/cashmere...would you mind taking it with you and dropping it in a vat for me? I could drop it by your apartment when I drop off the Depends Ann asked for.

Abigail said...

Getting to go to the haven of LL...lucky lucky man. Take your care, please. Share the joy with some of us who can't go...

Warrior Knitter said...

I think you did pretty well, considering you basically started out with a _____ slate.

Anonymous said...

November 15th...the release of the Beaujolais Neauvou AND the release of Franklin at LL!!!! I'll drink to that!

Anonymous said...

Oh, the ___ of knitting for the _____ holidays! Thanks - you really _____ my ___!

Anonymous said...

and people wonder why we gave up christmas... wonderful post!

Anonymous said...

Well, if the drape of the _____ on your _____ is a problem, often a little spray starch can fix things right up.
Maureen

SallyT said...

Hysterical! Just what I needed. It's so comforting to know that there are still people with a finely honed sense of humor!

Anonymous said...

Completely random comment, but I just found out that one of our Assoc. Deans is or was a member of a men's knitting group called "Dicks with Sticks". Just thought I'd share.

Anonymous said...

You always do have such a way with words.

Anonymous said...

The Teutons thank You for capitalizing the Noun in your second Caption.

FiberQat said...

Actually, if you _____ on the _______, you'd get better shaping there. Ann Coulter told me so.

Carson said...

:)
Pithy.

janna said...

How have I missed that Lorna's Laces' HQ is in Chicago????? And will they let run-of-the-mill fans in?

Jeanne said...

_____ ___, Franklin, ___ __ _______ ___! :-) ___ ___ __ ___ ______ ___, ___'__ ____ __ __ ______. Right?

(sorry. couldn't resist.)

Anonymous said...

Franklin darling, whatever you were on today... I want some.

Anonymous said...

A good laugh to interrupt the dreadful day at work. Thanks Franklin !

Petunia said...

The last time I spent so much time getting so little information was when I asked my oldest where he went on Prom Night, after the prom, that caused 565 miles to be added to the odometer on my car.

Knitting it Out in an Urban Zoo said...

Thank you for the out loud laugh that your post produced from me this morning.

Anonymous said...

Is this censoring skill left from the prison years????? I know everyone will love whatever you make them... You could make coasters and sell them for $25 each and people would buy them.

Cheri said...

__________!and________. Great________.

Seanna Lea said...

Ooh, I love Mad Libs. (umm, the picture might have been a bit blurry.)

Angie said...

I ____ you! You made me _____ out loud! Are you sure you are _____? I could use a _____ like you around my ________.

Nana Sadie said...

Oh I needed ______!!!
Thank you!!!
(((((_____)))))

Anonymous said...

Franklin, this is the best knitting blog post I've seen all year! Thank you!

Anonymous said...

this was hilarious, and made everyone in the office want to know why I was chuckling so loudly and dirtily. Thanks so much!

Toni said...

Your blog is one of the most clever ones I've seen in a long time! How fun!!!!

Karin said...

Please please say hi to Beth for me!! When I had my yarn shop (The Periwinkle Sheep in Albany, NY)I used to talk with her and order LL yarn and I loved it. Right now I am knitting/designing with Swirl DK and Chunky for a book contribution for Donna Druchunas.
I am so jealous you get to see the whole operation.

And you can stop pretending we all don't know you're knitting something fabulous for Miss Abigail!

Anonymous said...

I am so totally _____________. I can't believe you _________again! May your lace _______, that's all I can say.

Oh,right, Merry __________ to you too, ____________.

Anonymous said...

As the Borg said, resistance is futile. I tried. I really tried. But I saw those blanks, and my mind went straight into the gutter via a Tilt-a-Whirl. Even Dolores would blush.

So I'm glad you're not really knitting ____ a ____ in ____ yarn in the ____ colorway. I'd hate to hear about you being ____ to death with a Christmas ____.

Anonymous said...

If that's for me, could you move the
_______s up a couple rows and the ________s down about two inches? My _______s aren't as perky as they used to be.

Dana S. Whitney said...

I found out you have an agent. I AM SO EXCITED THERE ARE GOING TO BE BOOKS. I hope I don't have to hold my breath for too long. That's all I'll say.

sfmommy99 said...

oh

my

god

you are funny

Anonymous said...

I'm also knitting ______ but I never would have described it that way. What I want to know is, how the heck do you find the perfect pictures? Did you google on "vat"?

Gerrie in MN

Anonymous said...

oh franklin--- have you succombed to a LL entangled death? Have you drowned in chocolate colored yarn?

Or, are you- perhaps- barricaded in at LL headquarters- armed with circs and straights- bad highly flammable acrylic taped to your chest like dynamite- threatening to blow up the place if they don't give it ALL to you.. NOW?


just wonderin;)

Anonymous said...

O Dear, it looks like the Gift I knitted for all my friends and they hated it (they told me afterwards) They all brought it to a 2nd handshop for charity (But nothing was sold till now and even giving it away for free didn't work)
And because of this gift I almost lost all my friends!!!!!! :-(

Karen S, Lykkefanten said...

I like the idea... that might save a whole lot of typing from now till Christmas ;-)
You make me smile, and I want to award you "You make me smile"... you don't have to follow up on it, but you deserved the nomination from my point of view!

Kristen said...

Damn, I'm so boring... everyone else already thought of MadLibs. At least I'm not the only one who has active memories of early adolescence. (Ones that aren't the stuff of nightmares, that is).

Agen Bola said...

Very good written post. It will be helpful to everyone who usess it, including yours truly :). Keep doing what you are doing - looking forward to more posts.

Obat Wasir said...

pengobatan kutil di sekitar kelamin pengobatan kutil kelamin obat kutil kelamin pada priaherbal ampuh kutil kelamin