Breasts Do the Darnedest Things
I'm starting to understand (though not condone) the penchant of fashion designers to hang their clothes on models who look like clothes hangers with poor appetites. Breasts are nice and all, I suppose, but the fact is they often seem to get in the way.
For the second time now I've had a comment that one of my shirt designs misbehaves when draped over a bodacious bustline. This time it's the original Dolores shirt, which for some buxom persons aligns the copyright notice and Web site address directly with said person's nipular regions. Oy. I'll fix the design as soon as possible, and do please accept my apologies. In the meantime, caveat emptor unless you're built like Olive Oyl. [Author's note: It's fixed now.]
(Dolores commented that she was amazed I'd managed to correctly locate female nipples at all, even indirectly.)
Knit in Public Day Gone Wild
My offer to add new cities, countries, or organizations to the list of those available on the Knit in Public Day shirts and bags has been eagerly taken up (thanks, y'all) and the following are now available:
Atlanta
Austin
Berkeley
B'nai Shalom
Boston
Cairo
Chicago
Columbus
Dayton
Denver
Eugene
Honolulu
Iowa City
Kathmandu
Lexington
London
Montréal
Minneapolis
Munich (München)
Nashua
New York
Omaha
Ottawa
Paris
Philadelphia
Pittsburgh
Portland
Providence
Rochester
San Diego
San Francisco
St Louis
Sapporo
Scotland
Seattle
Sydney
Tel Aviv
Tokyo
Toronto
Ulaanbaatar
Vancouver (and I fixed the date)
Vienna (Wien)
Washington, DC
West Hollywood
Wichita
And there's a "generic" version with no city, just the date.
I have my doubts about orders reaching Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia by 10 June, but I admire the optimism of the request.
And One More
A new design called "Peaceable Kingdom" is ready on a bag and a card, and will make its way onto other stuff as time permits.
Well if you have dumplings worthy of the name and you wear a design anything could happen..a nice circle and you look down to see them screaming "she's got nipples" ..a couple of corn-plasters could sort it out or tees with a design on the back .After breat-feeding they stand out like fingers anyhow ..that's nature ( apologies if anyone blushes).
ReplyDeleteTYPO ! ..that is "breast" if you only knew how I hate typing and don't expect spell-check I'll get U.S spelling screaming at me.
ReplyDeleteLMAO @ fingers. Too funny.
ReplyDelete(I have also noticed that, now that I have been nursing for some time, the cold sensitivity is astounding. I could be used as a sundial in colder climes.)
Ahem.
I LOVELOVELOVE the dog and cat. They are so sweet, I could just swoon.
Okay Franklin, you may not want your name on womens breasts, but it is good advertizing to get your name out there. Some of us could get them way out there for you.
ReplyDeleteThe person who requested Ulaanbaatar, if it is who I think it is, could get that advertising WAY out there :-)
ReplyDeleteI personally have no trouble with the idea of placing your URL right where people are looking anyway. Because, well, I like you, and it's a little more genteel than "My Breasts Can't Hear You."
Not that I'm all that genteel to begin with...
And thanks for the accent on Montréal. We appreciate it. Both of us ;-)
That's so funny. Since that's exactly what me and my husband did on both saturday and sunday- hand wound hanks of yarn into balls.
ReplyDeleteOh, wait, you didn't put the accent on Montréal on the shirt.
ReplyDeleteSigh. Time to whip out the Sharpie, baby....
Howdy there! LUV the dog and cat. Seeing them gave me a vision of a lamb and rabbit doing the same thing together. After all, they ARE wool makers for us, too. ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd as for KIP Day, I'll be sending an email off to you for PROVIDENCE, RI!
Take care and hug Dolores for me!
=:8
Tontant Weader fwowed up.
ReplyDeleteNow, you just hush, Marilyn. I'm coming up for another design, just for you, where the dog and cat are trying to garrotte one another with Addi turbos.
ReplyDeleteLee Ann, sugar - I added the accent. I thought one did not place them over capital letters (thus spake Mme. Crecy back in college). But if you want the accent, the accent you shall have.
Thank you for the addition of Berkeley -- ended up ordering four shirts. Sylvia
ReplyDeleteBreasts do the darndest things? That's funny, because my breasts don't do anything but hang there. I suspect they'd be somewhat resistant to learning any sort of tricks at this late date.
ReplyDelete1. Lee Ann, I assume you are referring to moi, Ulaan Bataar-wise and, well, let's just say it, bodacious ta-ta-wise? Hate to disappoint you, but it ain't me. I may be all involved in knitting for Mongolian orphans and such but, still, astonishing as it may seem, I did not request the Ulan Bataar t-shirt design. Which now leaves us both to wonder, who IS it?
ReplyDelete2. Franklin, I hate to disappoint you but boobies come in various shapes and sizes and levels of perkiness and droopiness. If you fix the design for Woman A, it won't work for Woman B. If you fix it for Woman B, it won't work for Woman C. And so on, and so on, and so on, until Woman Z. And let's not even TALK about what different bras can do for one's anatomy. Sorry, dude. You could drive yourself crazy trying to fix this problem.
Personally, I've been feeling a bit repressed and under appreciated lately. Mebbe I'd better get me one o' them "let's draw some attention to the girls" t-shirts while I still can... 'Cept it's the 'All this and I knit too" shirt I want when my Visa's recovered enough from MD.
ReplyDeleteI really like your Peacable Kingdom design.
ReplyDeleteRyan: I'm guessing you don't own a pair (of boobs, that is... however...). Trust me, the design can be easily fixed. And fixed it should be. Floating, indecipherable, tiny pieces of text that look like streaks of dirt hovering somewhere below the boob area, inches away from the main tshirt attraction, isn't really good tshirt design anyway. For men or women. If the text was big enough for me to see in the Cafepress preview I wouldn't have bought the shirt in the first place, that's how small it is. I'm sure Franklin will find suitable homes for a copyright and a URL. It's not rocket science... just tuck it underneath the drawing.
ReplyDelete-Brenda
Brenda, reread Ryan's post. She has, and I quote, "bodacious ta-tas".
ReplyDeletePersonally, I think there needs to be a Dolores t-shirt that says Bootylicious. (Boobylicious?)
Ahh, poor Franklin, breasts have taken over his comments.
Don't you mean boobs, Pacalaga??
ReplyDeletethanks for the Eugene T :D
ReplyDeleteWhat you imagine is what you get! Way to go, Franklin! Just ordered my Pittsburgh shirt this afternoon. I may not make it down to Point State Park for the official gathering during the Arts Festival (which always brings on the horrendous weather), but I'll be flashing my intention wherever I may be ;-)
ReplyDeleteFranklin, you really are getting into the role of man-whore beautifully - touting your wares at every opportunity. I felt like you had dropped your pants while we were sitting at a restaurant sipping on expensive cocktails and I just didn't know WHERE to put my face!
ReplyDeleteGlad you've had such a good response to the KIP tees... perhaps Brisbane will be on there next year, if I get over my innate shyness and wallflower-ishness. I'm such a friggin' shrinking violet, really!
Ryan's right: I meant her. And she, yes, SHE is a goddess of the most graciously endowed variety. Not only that, but she is so right: you are never going to get every girl's girls right, so don't even worry about the nipple placement. It's a lost cause.
ReplyDeleteAnd regarding the accent in Montréal: if we were in France, you're absolutely right, there would be no accent over a capital letter. But, short story long, there's a huge pond between us, and we are replete with a cadre of wonky accents over capital letters, pasteurized cheese and wine "reserved" for Nawth 'Mericans, and a whole new brave new world of swearing based on the Mother Mary and her lot, so...looks like we're not in France anymore, Toto....
God, it makes my day when you call me sugar :-)
I LOVE the Peacable Kingdom design Franklin! I'm not sure how to suggest this...I do not want to tell a talented artist what to draw, no way. I would, however, LOVE to see how you would render the Lion and the Lamb version of Peacable Kingdom though. No, I wasn't thinking of Delores as the 'Lion' but hey, whatever. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm with Marilyn on the Addi turbo version!
ReplyDeleteI notice that someone has requested a London version of KIP, if that's London, England and you'd like company - email me on sarahratcatalysmdotcom
Franklin, all this breast talk is making me fidgety and nervous. Let's get back to the fireman . . .
ReplyDeleteRyan has a good point. What works for one person won't work for another. But your info on breasts - good advertisement - on second thought, maybe it's not good for advertising. Some men get pretty distracted when looking at breasts and therefore wouldn't remember what was on them.
ReplyDeleteBeast-feeding would be appropos for some. It's hard to feed from a breat. And for some, corn plasters just won't do it. Get some industrial moleskin or duct tape (shave first!).
ReplyDeleteThanks for putting up Portland in the list of cities. Cute cartoon!
Just so's you know. We have a lovely place here in Central Texas that is also called Peaceable Kingdom. It is a camp-like facility for handicapped children, as well as children going through traumatic illnesses. The kids get to swim, hike, canoe, ride horses, etc., and generally just have fun. I don't know if there is and infringement problem here, but I thought you ought to know.
ReplyDeleteMaybe Delores would be willing to try on a stuffed C or D-cup every once in awhile for you? She can adjust the straps to varying levels of perky or droopy (lordy, the image). Seems she would dig playing fashion runway diva, no?
ReplyDeleteI agree all women are different, but ta-ta's ARE typically in the same general vicinity. I love my shirt and wear it proudly, anyhow...green yarn ball left titty headlight and all ;-)
in re: breasts doing the darnedst things...try golfing or archery in them...on second thought, never mind. They do however come in handy as crumb catchers and cat beds. Just in case you ever get a question about that.
ReplyDeleteBTW, how can you not love a guy who blogs about sheep, knitting, and boobs?