It's time for Panopticon Celebrity Smackdown III.
Marilyn "The Knitting Curmudgeon" Roberts vs.Who do you back in Live Pigeon Shooting?
Joe "Queer Joe" Wilcox
Live Pigeon Shooting is a now-defunct Olympic event that was held only once, in 1900. The rules, according this handy site, were:
The birds were released in front of a participant and the winner was the competitor who shot down the most birds from the sky.There you have it. Each vote equals one dead bird. PETA members and pigeon fanciers may substitute an imaginary clay pigeon. Jean Miles may pretend they are shooting at rabbits if it makes her feel better.
The gunfire stops around 5 p.m. United States Central Standard Time on Thursday, March 16, 2007.
Now you might think that this one goes to Mar, hands down: she's a curmudgeon, and he's ... well, queer. But knowing them both as I do, I say Joe. Mar has a much softer heart than her crusty demeanor indicates. Plus Joe is really competitive; he's likely to pull a Cheney on her.
ReplyDeleteOh Franklin, I do love you.
No contest, Franklin. Dead-eye Mar will win hands down.
ReplyDeleteyou are too funny! tough choice--
ReplyDeleteso when is dolores going to become tank top worthy?
Oh, Marilyn, without a doubt. And watch what she DOES with it once she's felled it. (She can put old Frank Perdue to shame, to absolute shame!)
ReplyDeleteAnd Marilyn is a goddess. Don't mess with her.
Even after reading Carol's persuasive analysis, I still vote Marilyn. I think she would be the first to adapt to an unfamilar technology. And while Joe might Cheney some people, I have a hard time seeing him do that to Mar.
ReplyDeleteFranklin, great illustration with the poll announcement.
We're back to the "Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill" argument. Poor, poor Jon.
ReplyDeleteI back Marilyn, just because I am currently knitting Not Really Lace.
ReplyDelete(Does that sound illogical to you? Wait while I get the giraffe.)
The Rare and Handy One, of course!
ReplyDeleteDunno, I could see Joe giving her a run for her money, but I have to go with Marilyn on this one.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, I thought Dorothy Parker would win out, too.
run a new poll, marylin vs dolores?
ReplyDeleteI don't know Queer Joe but Marilyn is ferocious! I only know her from her blog but she is wonderfully opinionated in these days of political correctness.
ReplyDeleteWhile I KNOW who would win the shooting contest, I can't say I will be able to win the voting contest, as Marilyn will be getting all the "Annie Oakley" votes.
ReplyDeleteThe voters also clearly haven't heard about my secret, antique gattling gun that will take out scores of flying rodents.
Well, one should perhaps vote for Joe. He's tricky.
ReplyDeleteI am enjoying everyone's thinking that Mar's the meaner.
Simply because she's not a suckup.
I have lots of evidence that proves otherwise.
Joe would win if he imagined all the pigeons were redumblicans.lu
ReplyDeleteWeavers got skillz!
ReplyDeleteShooting pigeons for sport with guns or words doesn't peak my interest...
ReplyDeleteNow if an *epee* were the contested weapon of choice, things could be witty and interesting without anyone getting hurt.
Epee.
Ipee, ewepee, heepee, sheepy...
I fear for the pigeons, be they live or clay...Ms. Curmudgeon's got a lot of pent up anger going on there (or so it seems...you know, I don't know her personally...I'm just sayin' that's how she comes across). And Joe comes across as far, far too sweet to be shootin' the bird(s).
ReplyDeleteI'm going to steer clear of this one. I don't have time to research who these people are and I don't vote uninformed. I'll let the real knitters decide this one.
ReplyDeleteI took less than 2 seconds to decide in this one. And I'm with the majority opinion. (See Dolores, I accidentally typed, "maaaajority.")
ReplyDeleteYvonne, you really don't know me. That may be a fortuitous thing, too. For both of us.
ReplyDeleteI honestly don't have pent-up anger. When I get pissed, I let it out immediately. In fact, I rarely lose my temper. I'm a let's-discuss-calmly sort of person. That's why I was happily married for 33 years to the same person.
If we're just talking about aim, Joe should win. After all, he presumably aims, whereas I sit.
If we're talkin' in-person snarky, Joe wins that one too.
Okay, I recognize that this post is over a year old at this point, but the pigeon-shooting reminded me of a fabulous book I read in middle school, called Wringer by Jerry Spinelli (of Maniac Magee fame) You have read Maniac Magee, I hope? If not, you must (it's written for 9-year-olds, it shouldn't take you very long).
ReplyDeleteIn any event, just thought you might be interested.
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